As much as the ACLU seems to disparage organized religion, You have to admit that sometimes church can provide some good humor. Here are some "unintended comedy" taken from real church bullitens:
Actual Announcements From Church
1. This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends
of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
2. Tuesday at 4:00 P.M. there will be an ice cream social. All
ladies giving milk, please come early.
3. Wednesday, the ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will
sing, "Put me in My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor.
4. Thursday at 5:00 P.M. there will be a meeting of the Little
Mothers Club. All wishing to become little mothers, please see the minister
in his study.
5. This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Smith to come forward
and lay an egg on the altar.
6. The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the
ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.
7. On Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the
expenses of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new
carpet, please come forward and get a piece of paper at the end of the
service.
8. The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and
they may be seen in the church basement Friday.
9. A bean supper will be held Saturday evening in the church basement.
Music will follow.
10. The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of
David Alan Bleser, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Delser.
Strange Cosmos can be a real help when your trying to get inspiration...
Posted by Delftsman3 at October 3, 2005 03:31 PM | TrackBack