Seems that the Obamatron has ginned up a whole new element!!!:
A new element has been discovered, however it's been in existence for
some years now.
Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest
element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium(
Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198
assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons,
which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles
called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it
can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes
into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction
that would normally take less than a second, to take from four days to
four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; It does not
decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of
the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time,
since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons,
forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to
believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical
concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical
morass.
When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium,
an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it
has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
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