Delftsman

BBQ RULES

It might seem ridiculous to talk about BBQing when there is a foot of snow on the ground and the wind chill index hasn't risen above 10 degrees in a month, but there are important safety rules associated with the manly tradition of the BBQ; Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity .

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill – beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Routine reminders thus far…

Here comes the important part:

(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat

(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.

Still pretty routine…

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

And most important of all:

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ’ her night off ’ and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there’s just no pleasing some women!

Women, just remember , the phrase "A perfect man" is an oxymoron!

Posted by Delftsman3 at January 11, 2010 05:01 PM | TrackBack