Delftsman

Police Humor

After getting all of Billy Graham's luggage loaded into the limo, the driver notices that the Mr. Graham is still standing on the curb.

"Excuse me, Mr. Graham," says the driver, "would you please take your seat so we can leave?"

"Well, to tell you the truth," says Mr. Graham, "they never let me drive
anymore, and I'd really like to drive today."

"I'm sorry but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job! And what if
something should happen?," protests the driver, wishing he'd never gone to work that morning.

"There might be something extra in it for you," s! ays Mr. Graham.

Reluctantly, the driver gets in the bac! k as Billy Graham climbs in behind
the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the
airport, Mr. Graham floors it, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.

"Please slow down, sir!!!" pleads the worried driver, but Billy keeps the
pedal to the metal until they hear sirens.

"Oh, man, I'm gonna lose my license," moans the driver.

Billy pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but the
cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the
radio.

"I need to talk to the Chief," he says to the dispatcher. The Chief gets on
the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going a hundred and five.

"So bust him," said the Chief.

"I don't think we want to do that, he's really important," said the cop.

Then the Chief exclaimed, "All the more reason!"

"No, I mean really important," said the cop.

The Chief then asked, "Who ya got there, the Mayor?"

Cop: "Bigger."

Chief: "Governor?"

Cop: "Bigger."

"Well," said the Chief, "who is it?"

Cop: "I think it's God!"

Chief: "What makes you think it's God?"

Cop: " He's got Billy Graham for a limo driver!"

*********************************
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture .....of handcuffs

*********************************
A woman was reporting her car as stolen, and mentioned that there was a car phone in it. The policeman taking the report called the phone and told the guy that answered that he had read the ad in the newspaper and wanted to buy the car. They arranged to meet, and the thief was arrested.

Good News

Kim du Toit has a post up on some news that you won't see in the LSM. It seems that if it doesn't bleed, or put Bush in a bad light, it isn't news. Do yourself a favor and go read it; not everything is as bad as the powers of the Media Elite would have you believe.

Quote of the Day

"It is the soldier, not the reporter who has given us the freedom of the press. It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech. It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate. It is the soldier who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag."
~Father Dennis Edward O'Brien, Sargeant, USMC

I thought that this was appropiate for the day after Memorial Day. I think that it should be a poster put up in evey classroom in America. It seems that some peope don't "get it". While cruising through some comments at other sites I found statements such as "Most days I don't even think about the war anymore. I don't know anyone who's over there or who's going so it's not a big deal to me...." and "It's all about choices. If your smart you don't choose to join the army or whatever, cause you know you are probably going to have to go to a war somewhere."

To that person, I say,: You DO know everyone that is over there; they are your fellow Americans. They are the clerk in the store you buy your groceries at; they are the teachers that taught at your school; they are the policemen that patrolled your neighborhood; She was a teller at your bank, he was the guy that delivered your new furniture. They are all a part of your everyday life, and they put their regular lives on hold so that you could continue to blithely remain ignorant of the evil that is howling outside the door like a ravenous wolf. A soldier has nothing to do with choosing where and when, or even why, they fight. They make no policy, they just carry it out, trusting that our leaders know the where,when and why.

You may have a problem with the decisions of those leaders, and protest them if you feel strongly enough about it, but just remember that it is those selfsame soldiers that give you those rights, and keep you comfortable enough to be able to debate the politics.

Yes, if you join the Armed Services, there is a possibility that you will be called on to travel to some pretty miserable places and do some miserable, dirty, and dangerous things. Many times you won't even know why your there. But you have to have faith that in some way, it helps furthur the maintenance of our freedom.

In the end, it usually boils down to not letting your squad mates down. You don't think about the big issues, or the high flying rhetoric; you just do the best job you can protecting the guy next to you, and hope he's doing the same for you. But out of that mutual protection comes the force needed to support the the ideals and the rhetoric we can debate about, safely nestled here at home. It's up to US, the people, to hold our leaders accountable. But to be able to hold those leaders accountable, we need to be educated and involved. The troops have been doing their job for the last 200+ years; sadly, the people, especially in the last 30 years haveallen far from their responsibilities.

They have allowed the "experts" to raise their children and instill their public values and haven't kept an eye on just what those "experts" are instilling in the children. Thats a whole other post, but it is part of the problem presented in this one.

All too often, what passes for public debate today is based on the "feelings" that pass for education. Memes are put out as wisdom, and "self-esteem" has been put ahead of hard nosed striving for achievment. History is being warped to fit the agenda of the moment (when it's taught at all), and realities are discounted as being "too dirty" to countenance in realpolitic.

Unless and untill we can return to old fasioned agreement on basic moral tenents and mores, we will always be a nation floundering to come to common agreement. But the Soldier is the person that allows us the time and freedom to come to those agreements. NEVER FORGET Honor their sacrifices by
takeing back your responsiblities as a citizen in a free Republic and do your best to live up to them.

Memorial Day

What if the tables were turned...

My friend Catfish sent this along...and like it said; if you agree, pass it along, and so I am. To you.


I thought I should pass this along, it gives everyone a perspective on what a reality check is all about.

Try driving around as a Gringo in Mexico with no liability insurance and have an accident.

Enter Mexico illegally...Never mind immigration quotas, visas, international law or any of that nonsense.

Once there, demand that the local government provide free medical care for you and your entire family.

Demand bilingual nurses and doctors.

Demand free bilingual local government forms, bulletins, etc.

Procreate abundantly.

Deflect any criticism of this allegedly irresponsible reproductive behavior with, "It is a cultural United States thing... You wouldn't understand, pal."

Keep your American identity strong. Fly Old Glory from your rooftop or proudly display it in your front window or on your car bumper.

Speak only English at home and in public, then insist that your children do likewise.

Demand classes on American culture in the Mexican school system.

Demand to be eligible for Mexican retirement funds into which you never contributed.

Demand a local Mexican driver license. This will afford other legal rights and will go far to legitimize your unauthorized, illegal presence in Mexico.

Insist that local Mexican law enforcement teach English to all its officers.

Good luck! Because it will never happen. It will not happen in Mexico or any other country in the world..except right here in the United States...Land of the naive! If you agree, pass it on. If you don't, move to Mexico...or Iraq...or France.

Oh... And one more thing... don't drink the water.

OUTRAGEOUS!!

I picked up my copy of the local newspaper to day (The Indianapolis Star)and there on the banner was:"Judge; Parents can't teach Pagan beliefs" :Father appeals order in divorce decree that prevents couple from exposing son to Wicca.

Seems that Cale J. Bradford, chief judge of the Marion Superior Court, took it upon himself to dictate what form of religeous instruction the child involved in this divorce could be exposed to.

This caused a RCOB moment for me to be sure. I am not a Wiccan, but I am familier with Wiccan precepts and main beliefs, and I can see nothing in those beliefs that could in any way harm this young man, in fact I believe that they can be a beautiful enhancement of mainstream religious beliefs...I know quite a few people that consider themselves as "_______/Wiccan". They participate in both creeds without any seeming dichotomy at all.

For a member of the Judiciary to place such an arbitrary order in a divorce decree ESPECIALLY as there had been no complaint from either party about religeous beliefs is nothing less than governing a private belief by judicial fiat.

I can only say I am ashamed that a member of the party I am nomially affiliated with could could attempt such an outrageous grab of power as a member of the judiciary. This is not the first time that Judge Bradford has tried to expand the scope of the judiciary.

I hope, (and believe) that this travesty will be overturned at the next appellate level, but the fact remains that it happened at all is a sign of something wrong in the state of Indiana. Hoosiers have always prided themselves on common sense and a certain tolerance of belief.

Yes, we have our share of the ultra-radicals on BOTH sides of the spectrum, but the majority usually discounts them as the idiots that they are. For an authority figure such as a judge, especially a Chief Judge of a division, to act in such a manner is a blot on the entire State, Christian majority, and the conservative movement. I find it intolerable that I will be colored by that same brush by virtue of believing in a conservative POV.

This action was NOT in line with conservatism, but it will be held up as a poster issue by those that look at conservatives as the bogeymen trying to restrict their beliefs. True Conservatives want everyone to have the freedom to practice their own beliefs without interference from any outside source; up till now we could cite the ACLU and some fringe groups such as the Atheists for a Free America as the main proponents against that freedom of practice, now, alas, we have one of the "mainstream" doing the same.

Citizens need to keep aware of what all their public officials are doing in their name, regardless of political affiliation, and protest at the first sign of over-reaching by those officials.

You may be assurred that I will remember Judge Bradford in his next standing for election, and will work to ensure that it isn't a successful one.

Cows

DEMOCRAT
You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbra Streisand sings for you.

SOCIALIST
You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST
You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

REPUBLICAN, Believer in Capitalism
You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support
a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your
government.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you
for the milk, and then pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are
surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to
the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary
cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give
excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks
of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You have some more vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.

TALIBAN CORPORATION
You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private
parts. Then you kill them and claim a U.S. bomb blew them up while
they were in the hospital.

IRAQIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.

POLISH CORPORATION
You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

FLORIDA CORPORATION
You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who like the brown one best, vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which is the
best-looking cow.

NEW YORK CORPORATION
You have fifteen million cows.
You have to choose which one will be the leader of the herd, so you
pick some fat cow from Arkansas

Hat Tip to SlagleRock

When Graphics Artists get Bored

Ever wonder what happens when a computer graphics artist gets bored?

Here's some possible results:

Now THERE'S a ride I'D like to take!

And yes, some Voyeurism:

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

"republicans"(in name only) cave to the minority

John McCain,R(hino)-Az. has just convinced 6 of his fellow R(hinos) to bend over and take it from the DemoncRat minority. Only McCain and Lindsey Graham had the guts to openly display their cowardice, but to you five others, you WILL be found out, and we WILL remember the next election cycle.

Lord Spatula says it all. I agree., with the sentiment, if not the florid rhetoric.

One more Blow against Individual Choice

Gary Varval's cartoon says it all. The local government here is preparing to limit our individual freedom ( for our own good, of course!).

It's taken a longer time to get this anti-smoking legislation enacted here than in a lot of other large cities, but it seems that the forces of the nanny state will have triumphed in the end....

Free Speech....unless it pertains to a Judge

Seems that Judge Joan Humphrey Lefkow wants to have legislation enacted banning what she calls ""truly dangerous" verbal attacks on judges that might lead to violent action."

Judge Lefkow, welcome to the world of the average citizen. How many times have ordinary citizens tried to bring their verbal tormentors to court, only to be told that "free speech is a valid defense" for the defendant? And how many times has the verbal torment escalated into physical violence? Why should Judges receive any different treatment?

Free speech for all entails some personal responsibility. Making Judges a separate class is not the answer. There are already laws against "incendiary speech", let them live under those as all the rest of us do.

Federal Judges already have special protection by the US Marshalls Service, and I don't begrudge them that. It's in the nature of their profession that they will receive more (and more likely real) threats against their persons and that of their familes, and they do deserve that protection. But when it comes to singleing out speech against one segment of the population for special protection.....IF the Congress does enact such legislation, we may as well start deciding who the Glorious Leader will be....we will no longer be a Republic in any case.

Hat tip to DK for the heads up!

Newsweek's furthur descent

As you can see, the cover story shows an American flag, dirtied and tossed in a trash can, its staff snapped in two. The large white text reads, "Amerika ga shinda hi", which translates to "The day America died."

For the complete story, go to Rising Sun. If what you read there doesn't prove to you that something is truly rotten at Newsweek, then you are living far up the river of De Nile.

Hat tip to Jack for the heads up

Death, taxes, and credit card bills

This is just a humorous parody, if it isn't actually true... :

Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is just so priceless, and so easy to see happening, customer service being what it is today.

A relative died this past January, and Citibank billed her for January and February for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now it was somewhere around $60.00.

I placed a call to Citibank:

"I am calling to tell you that she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Me: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections."

Citibank: "Since it is 2 months past due, it already has been."

Me: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

Citibank: "Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!"

Me: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"

Citibank: "Excuse me?"

Me: "Did you just get what I was telling you--The part about her being dead?"

Citibank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor."

Supervisor gets on the phone:
Me: "I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Me: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"

Citibank: (Stammer). "Are you her lawyer?"

Me: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given)

Citibank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"

Me: "Sure." (Fax number is given)

After they get the fax:

Citibank: "Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what more I can do to help."

Me: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don't think she will care."

Citibank: "Well, the late fees and charges do still apply."

Me: "Would you like her new billing address?"

Citibank: "That might help."

Me: "Odessa Memorial Cemetery
Hwy 129,

plot number 6 9

Odessa, Texas."

Citibank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"

Me: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"

To Filibuster or Not.....

LindaSOG has an enlightening post on Judicial Activism. I'm proud to say that, apparently, I meet ALL the criteria to be a right wing radical.

Another new addition

Welcome The Warrior Poet to the blog-family. Mamamontezz has struck again.

To all you readers that don't blog themselves, should you want to get your feet wet, send me an e-mail, or leave yours in the comments, with what your idea for the perfect blog for you would be, and I'm sure that Mama will set you up in your own little domecile where you can express yourself, rant and rave, or just plain gossip.

She will set you up in Blog-City.com, which is a free hosting provider, and she loves making banners to fit your personality/site thrust. Should you wish to express your gratitude for the effort, she would accept a contribution to her tip jar, but thats by no means compulsorary.

Shillery Watch

Hillary Clinton is supposed to be "the smartest woman in politics"....
She keeps insisting that her focus is to get re-elected to her New York Senate seat....So WHY is she inviting a group of Iowans to a fund raiser in D.C.?

Conventional wisdom is that she will be the one to beat in the Democratic Primaries in 2008. Everyone is taking it as a given that she WILL be running for President, her protestations of "only being interested in retaining her Senate seat" to the contrary.

Seems that schemers and liars just can't ever be open in their actions, it's contrary to their nature; but to believe that the electorate will buy that she is inviting IOWANS to help raise funds for a NEW YORK Senate seat demonsterates her true contempt of the "little people".

The trouble is that the majority of the Left will drink that Kool-aid with gusto, even knowing it's nothing but a classic, albeit clumsy, misdirection.

As a personal observation; this may be one reason that the Left is so ready to accuse their political counterparts as being cheats and liars, when they accept and even to some extant promote such qualities in their own standard bearers.

Personally, I believe that ALL politicians are liars, it's a necessary talent to have in a successful political career, but it's essential that the politician not be perceived as lying; clumsy misdirections such as espoused by the Clinton political machine just demonstrate that Hillary is just not good candidate material for any non-idiologically driven, thinking, person.

Hitch does Galloway

Christopher Hitchens weighs in with his usual razor sharp knife on the Galloway performance in front of Congress.

Too bad the Progressives won't accept any facts put in evidence against their new "hero of the proletariat".... Especially by people that really know the feet of clay person, rather than the iconic representation of Leftist complaint.

My dad always told me that if it waddled like a duck and quacked like a duck, it most likely WASN'T a cat. Yeah, the Old Man doesn't have a way with words...but he is right, nonetheless.

Quote of the day

Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.
Robert Heinlein (1907 - 1988), Time Enough For Love--1978

Remember

Every hour of every day there is a dedicated group of men and women that form themselves into a "thin blue line". The are the glue that keeps a thin veneer of civility in place. They are all heroes, although they are not saints.
They struggle with the same question we all have about life, and our society and where it's headed. But they must put their personal questions aside and try to keep the status quo running smoothly while ensuring the status quo doesn't become a smothering weight that slowly chokes the life out of us.

These are the men and women of Law Enforcement. I am very proud to have once counted myself among their members. They should never be regarded as above the rest of us, they are all too human, with all that entails; BUT they should merit respect for their constant struggle against the evils in our society that threaten to overcome all that is good in life.

Here is a tribute written by one of their own. It touched me deeply. I've been there when they finally managed to cut the last piece of wreckage blocking access to an accident victom, only to find it was too late to help them. I was there on the front porch when a mother found out that her son would never come home again. I had known the son for four years. I was grieving with her, but could not presume to show it, as it would have been unprofessional, and only add to her pain. Deputy Lindsey has composed a fitting tribute, I am humbled to be able to pass it along.

You Don't Remember Me, Do You...
by Tim Lindsey, Lamar County Sheriff's Dept.

You don't remember me, do you...

I was the one who unlocked your car after you accidentally locked the keys and your baby up at the mall.

I was the one who gave you a ride to the gas station when you ran out of gas on that backroad.

I was the one who changed your tire because you couldn't figure out how to work the stupid scissor jack.

I was the one who directed you safely through that busy intersection when the traffic signals weren't working.

I was the one who gave you a jump-start after you left your lights on.

You don't remember me, do you...

I was the one who found the item that identified the guy who raped your daughter.

I was the one who spent my days off in court to testify and help convict the man who beat your son so badly.

I was the one who located your grandmother in the woods that night when it was 22 degrees and she had wandered away from the nursing home.

I was the one who loaned you the raincoat the night we stood and watched your house burn.

I was the one who talked with you for two hours about your son running away from home.

You don't remember me, do you...

I was the one who held your hand, wiped the blood out of you eyes, and calmed you down while the Fire Department cut you out of what was left of your car.

I was the one who called you at 2 a.m. to come pick up your 16 year old daughterbecause she had been drinking too much.

I was the one who knocked on your door at 4 a.m. to let you know your 16 year old daughter would never be coming home again.

I was the one who did CPR on your 3 year old after you found him in the pool.

I was the one who helped deliver your new baby when you didn't quite make it to the ER.

You don't remember me, do you...

I was the one who got that snake out of your bathroom around midnight.

I was the one who got my knees and elbows scraped up fighting with the shoplifter with your carton of cigarettes.

I was the one who took your son for a "ride-along" so he could see what it was really like.

I was the one who gave you the right directions so you wouldn't miss that business meeting.

I was the one who stopped you to let you know your right rear tire was going flat.

You don't remember me, do you...

I was the one who escorted your son's funeral procession from the church to the cemeteryand cried behind my sunglasses because he was my friend, too.

I was the one watched over your place while you were on vacation.

I was the one who worked for you on Christmas Day so you could be off with your family.

I was the one who joked around with you after your truck got hit by a trainand you walked away without a scratch.

I was the one was able to talk your husband into going into counseling with you.

You don't remember me, do you...

I was the one who got shot when I pulled over a car for a traffic violation and the driver turned out to be an escaped convict who had sworn he would never go back to prison.

Oh, by the way, my memorial service is at 2 p.m.

Will you remember me now?

Quote of the Day

"Pacifism is a shifty doctrine under which a man accepts the benefits of the
social group without being willing to pay--and claims a halo for his
dishonesty."

-Robert A. Heinlein

Child Discipline

To spank or not to spank? That is the question. Personally, I firmly believe that there are some times when children just need a firm swat on the rear to engage their brains to what your trying to put down to them.

Others do have other methods however:

Tough Love vs. Spanking

Most of America's populace thinks it is very improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control our kids when they have one of"those moments".

One that I found very effective is for me to just take the child for a car ride and talk.

They usually calm down and stop misbehaving after our little car ride together.

I've included the photo below of one of my sessions, with our son, in case you would like to use the technique.

Its very effective!

Now THATS really tough love!!!

National ID

Eric Cowperthwaite has a good mini essay of why he is so concerned with the the National ID recently enacted and due to be fully operative by 2008.

A commenter of his said that he didn't see just what Eric was so concerned about. I can't believe that there are still people so naive as to believe that the dangers to individual freedom inherent in such a program won't occur because "the government just won't".

For myself, I do believe that this legislation is one of the final nails in the coffin of the old Republic and the first murmer of the totalitarianistic government to come. It's been a long process to this juncture, and started with the idea that the individual "just couldn't do it" by dint of his own efforts, but needed the largess of the Federal government to succeed.

I have been accused by some of my readers of being an "overalarmed right wingnut" because I saw many of these programs coming out of the Democratic party. (alas, the Republicans seem to have joined this movement of late, with all too much enthusiasm)

All I have to say is that my stance on the 2nd Amendment being the final defense against governmental tyranny is now being borne out, for if the majority of the people don't wake up to their freedoms slipping away at an ever growing pace, it will soon come to the point where nothing less than a second civil war will be necessary if we are to regain that freedom that is the birthright of every American.

I despair to see it happening, I wish that it would be otherwise; but now I can only pray that there are enough of our population brave enough to be able to make that step, should it become the only solution left.

At this moment there is still a small amount of time to change our course, but it will take a massive awakening of the populace to do so.
I can hold some small hope that the Blogosphere can play a part in this awakening, with people like Eric, Misha, RWR,Kim, and yes, I'll be immodest enough to say, me. Each person's voice is like a small cry in the wilderness, but if we band together, those individual voices can become a might roar indeed.

Hebrew Anthropology

Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols:

It was considered a unique find and the writings were said to be at least three thousand years old!

The piece of stone was removed, brought to the museum, and archaeologists from around the world came to study the ancient symbols. They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss the meaning of the markings.

The President of the society pointed to first drawing and said: "This is a woman. We can see these people held women in high esteem. You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol is a donkey, so they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil.
The next drawing is a shovel, which means they had tools to help them."

Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish which means that if a famine hit the earth and food didn't grow, they seek food from the sea. The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were evidently Hebrews.

The audience applauded enthusiastically.

Then a little old Jewish man stood up in the back of the room and said, "Idiots, Hebrew is read from right to left......
It says: 'Holy Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Woman'

Tomb of the Unknown

With all thats been going on, I felft it was only right to revisit an old subject.

TOPIC: Tomb of the Unknown Soldiers

1. How many steps does the guard take during his walk across the
tomb of the Unknowns and why?

21 steps. It alludes to the twenty-one gun salute, which is the
highest honor given any military or foreign dignitary.

2. How long does he hesitate after his about face to begin his
return walk and why?

21 seconds for the same reason as answer number 1

3. Why are his gloves wet?

His gloves are moistened to prevent his losing his grip on the
rifle.

4. Does he carry his rifle on the same shoulder all the time
and if not, why not?

He carries the rifle on the shoulder away from the tomb.
After his march across the path, he executes an about face
and moves the rifle to the outside shoulder.

5. How often are the guards changed?

Guards are changed every thirty minutes,
twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year.

6. What are the physical traits of the guard limited to?

For a person to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he must be
between 5' 10" and 6'! 2" tall and his waist size cannot exceed 30." Other
requirements of the Guard: They must commit 2 years of life to guard the
tomb, live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannot drink any alcohol on
or off duty for the rest of their lives. They cannot swear in public for the
rest of their lives and cannot disgrace the uniform {fighting} or the tomb in
any way. After two years, the guard is given a wreath pin that is worn on
their lapel signifying they served as guard of the tomb. There are only
400 presently worn. The guard must obey these rules for the rest of their
lives or give up the wreath pin.

The shoes are specially made with very thick soles to keep the heat
and cold from their feet. There are metal heel plates that extend to the
top of the shoe in order to make the loud click as they come to a halt.
There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform. Guards dress for duty
in front of a full-length mirror.

The first six months of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone, nor
watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175 notable people laid
to rest in Arlington National Cemetery. A guard must memorize who they are
and where they are interred. Among the notables are: President Taft, Joe
E. Lewis {the boxer} and Medal of Honor winner Audie Murphy, {the most
decorated soldier of WWII} of Hollywood fame.

Every guard spends five hours a day getting his uniforms ready for
guard duty.

ETERNAL REST GRANT THEM O LORD, AND LET PERPETUAL LIGHT SHINE UPON THEM.

In 2003 as Hurricane Isabelle was approaching Washington, DC, our
US Senate/House took 2 days off ; with anticipation of the storm. On the ABC
evening news, it was reported that because of the dangers from the
hurricane, the military members assigned the duty of guarding the Tomb of
the Unknown Soldier were given permission to suspend the assignment. They
respectfully declined the offer, "No way, Sir!" Soaked to the skin,
marching in the pelting rain of a tropical storm, they said that guarding
the Tomb was not just an assignment, it was the highest honor that can be
afforded to a serviceperson. The tomb has been patrolled continuously,
24/7, since 1930.

God Bless and keep them.

Joke of the Day

Well, I've posted two "serious" posts, it's time to lighten up with just a little humor, courtesy of Catfish.

Jamaican Fireman

A Jamaican fireman came home from work,
one day and said to his wife,
"Y ' know sumpin, we have a wonderful new
system at de fire station."

"Bell 1 rings - we put on our jackets.
"Bell 2 rings - we slide down de pole.
"Bell 3 rings - we jump on de ingine and
we's ready to go.

From now on,
when I say, 'Bell 1 '
.....I want you to strip naked.
When I say, 'Bell 2 '
.....you jump on de bed.
When I say, 'Bell 3 '
.....we's gonna mek love all tru de night."

The next night, he came home and shouted,
"Bell 1 "
.....and the wife stripped naked.
"Bell 2 "
.....and she jumped on the bed.
"Bell 3 "
.....and they started to make love.

After a few minutes, the wife yelled out,
"Bell 4 ."

"What de hell is 'Bell 4 '?" he asked.

She replied,
....."Roll out more hose, mon,
you ain't nowhere near da fire!!!!!!!

And here's another one, from Bob:

Cowboy in a Gay Bar

A cowboy walks into a bar two steps when he realizes it's a gay bar.

What the heck," he says to himself, "I really want a drink." When the gay
waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy, "What's the name of your willy?"

The cowboy says, "Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink."

The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the
name of your willy. Mine for instance is called NIKE, for the slogan 'Just Do It.'

That guy down at the end of the bar calls his SNICKERS, because 'It really Satisfies." The cowboy looks dumbfounded, so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over.

So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left who is sipping on a beer,

Hey bud, what's the name of yours?"

The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX."

The thirsty cowboy asks, Why Timex?" The fella proudly replies, " 'Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!'"

A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fella's on his right, who happen to
be sharing a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you guys call yours?"

The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because 'Quality is Job One'." Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford lately?"

The guy next to him then says, "I call mine CHEVY, 'Like A Rock!' " And gives a wink!

Even more shaken, the Cowboy has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his manhood.

Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my willy is SECRET, Now give me a beer."

The bartender begins to pour the cowboy a beer,
but with a puzzled look asks, "Why Secret?"

The cowboy says, "Because it's 'STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!!!!!!!"

STOP the Idiocy NOW!

Many people are, RIGHTFULLY, complaining about the current state of the National Budget. It is a monster out of all control. If a private person or corporation were to conduct their financial life in the manner the Federal government has over the last century or so, they would be charged in a court of law for gross malfeasence and sentenced to a lengthy jail term upon conviction.

The fact is, MOST of the expenditures undertaken by Congress aren't even Constitutional!
Don't believe me? check out Article One,Section 8, of the U.S. Constitution, where the general powers given to Congress are enumerated. (for those that can't seem to use Google, due to their government school education, I've posted said Article/Section in the extended entry) Remember, under the 10th Amendment, Congress is FORBIDDEN to excersize any power not specifically authorised by the Constitution...so how is it that Congress routinely does just that?

By the power of an activist Judiciary...a Judiciary that has set as precedent that Congress has that authority to enact any number of (unconstitutional) programs under the auspices of the Interstate Commerce Clause. (thats clause number three of Article 1,Section 8 of the constitution btw) which states: (Congress has the power)To regulate Commerce with foreign Nations, and among the several States, and with the Indian Tribes;; and the General Welfare Clause (Article 1 Section 8, clause 1), which states:The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes, Duties, Imposts and Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States; but all Duties, Imposts and Excises shall be uniform throughout the United States;

How has this situation come to pass you ask? The original purpose of the Commerce Clause was primarily a means to eliminate trade barriers among the states. During the (Revolutionary) war, the 13 colonies formed a union under the Articles of Confederation (1778) whereby "Each state retains its sovereignty, freedom, and independence, and every power, jurisdiction, and right, which is not by this Confederation expressly delegated to the United States, in Congress assembled." The Treaty of Paris (1783) that ended the war between the colonies and Great Britain recognized 13 sovereign nations.

A key failing of the Articles of Confederation was the propensity of states to erect protectionist trade barriers. When the Framers met in Philadelphia in 1787 and wrote the constitution that governs us today, they addressed that failure through the commerce and the privileges and immunities clauses that created a national free-trade zone.

The trouble is that in the last 60 to 80 years, the federal Judiciary has made almost everything fall under the purview of the IC & GW clauses, giving Congress power far in excess of that envisioned by the founding fathers.

The Genii is out of the bottle, and no one today can seriously even imagine a return to a government such as we were governed under for the first hundred + years of our country's existance....but we had better try to curtail some of the more egregious examples of Federal unconstitutional overreaching of power if we wish to survive as a free nation.

Article 1-- Section 8 lays out the power granted to the Congress in 18 easily understood clauses, but by imputing "penumbras" and "emmanations" to these two clauses, allowing that they grant more power than they actually do, the judiciary has turned our government into something unrecognizable by any of the writers of that same Constitution.

What does all this have to do with the federal budget? Just this; IF we curtailed the government to those powers actually granted it under the Constitution, over half to three quarters of the current budget allocation expenditures would disappear. Use that money to pay off the current debt, repeal the Income tax law, and go to a National Sales tax (Fair Tax!!) and you would see a blossoming of prosperity and freedom not seen since the Revolution it'self.

To paraphrase an Icon of the Left; "you may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one; I hope someday you'll join us, and all our country will live as one, in freedom".

"The powers delegated by the proposed Constitution to the federal government are few and defined. Those which are to remain in the State governments are numerous and indefinite."

Walter Williams and Thomas Sowell both have excellant articles on the (extraConstitutional) abrogation of power by the Congress. I suggest you read them as a starter education in exactly how the Constitution has been, and is continuing to be circumvented.

Section. 8.
Clause 1: The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes, Duties, Imposts and Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States; but all Duties, Imposts and Excises shall be uniform throughout the United States;

Clause 2: To borrow Money on the credit of the United States;

Clause 3: To regulate Commerce with foreign Nations, and among the several States, and with the Indian Tribes;

Clause 4: To establish an uniform Rule of Naturalization, and uniform Laws on the subject of Bankruptcies throughout the United States;

Clause 5: To coin Money, regulate the Value thereof, and of foreign Coin, and fix the Standard of Weights and Measures;

Clause 6: To provide for the Punishment of counterfeiting the Securities and current Coin of the United States;

Clause 7: To establish Post Offices and post Roads;

Clause 8: To promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts, by securing for limited Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings and Discoveries;

Clause 9: To constitute Tribunals inferior to the supreme Court;

Clause 10: To define and punish Piracies and Felonies committed on the high Seas, and Offences against the Law of Nations;

Clause 11: To declare War, grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal, and make Rules concerning Captures on Land and Water;

Clause 12: To raise and support Armies, but no Appropriation of Money to that Use shall be for a longer Term than two Years;

Clause 13: To provide and maintain a Navy;

Clause 14: To make Rules for the Government and Regulation of the land and naval Forces;

Clause 15: To provide for calling forth the Militia to execute the Laws of the Union, suppress Insurrections and repel Invasions;

Clause 16: To provide for organizing, arming, and disciplining, the Militia, and for governing such Part of them as may be employed in the Service of the United States, reserving to the States respectively, the Appointment of the Officers, and the Authority of training the Militia according to the discipline prescribed by Congress;

Clause 17: To exercise exclusive Legislation in all Cases whatsoever, over such District (not exceeding ten Miles square) as may, byCession of particular States, and the Acceptance of Congress, become the Seat of the Government of the United States, and to exercise like Authority over all Places purchased by the Consent of the Legislature of the State in which the Same shall be, for the Erection of Forts, Magazines, Arsenals, dock-Yards, and other needful Buildings;--And

Clause 18: To make all Laws which shall be necessary and proper for carrying into Execution the foregoing Powers, and all other Powers vested by this Constitution in the Government of the United States, or in any Department or Officer thereof.

The Speech Bush SHOULD be giving..

One of my best Blog-buddies, RWR, has written the speech that GW SHOULD be giving, instead of continuing to appease the likes of Vincente Faux. I'm reposting it here, w/o prior permission (forgive me R!), because I think he hit the nail on the head, and it's important to spread the word, and due to Blogsnots fickle nature, didn't want to risk losing it on just a link.

Here it is:

My fellow Americans:

Today, I stand before you in recognition of a problem we have been trying to solve for a long time. All but one of the terrorists who attacked our country in 2001 were here illegally, and many who come across our borders every year are here with less than good intentions.

In April of this year, a group of patriotic American citizens gathered to help patrol the Arizona border with Mexico. Armed only with cell phones, these great Americans helped to significantly reduce the flow of illegal immigration in the areas they patrolled.

Meanwhile, our servicemen and women are busy with the formidible task of taking the war to the terrorists, forcing these evildoers and the rogue regimes that support them to fight in their own territory, and bringing the blessings of Freedom to those who they have oppressed. For this, they deserve our unending praise, support, and admiration.

But the War on Terror cannot be won by our soldiers alone. Like our own Revolution, our citizens must participate in the protection of our homeland. Huge tasks such as hunting down dangerous terrorists should be left to our honorable soldiers; but more simple ones, such as securing our borders, will require the help of every patriotic American.

Today, I call on all Americans to be on the lookout for suspicious activity. If you live in a border state, use your right to peacefully assemble to gather in areas where illegal crossings take place. Alert the INS and the Border Patrol of the activities of people entering the country illegally. Help anyone who is sick, and feed anyone who is hungry, but use your power as Americans to couple this compassion with zeal for the protection of our liberty and the security of our borders.

America has, for many years, been known as the Land of Opportunity. Unfortunately, many have sought to seek the opportunity to use our good nature in an attempt to destroy us. It is time for every American to stand tall and participate in guarding those freedoms which are, and always will be, dear to us and what we stand for.

God bless you, and God bless America.

Now if George would just use the Cojones he's demonstrated he DOES possess in this area,(that of illegal immigration) it would ease some of the doubts some of us are feeling towards him. (There is also the issue of his out-of-control spending requests, but that's a whole other post entirely...)

Another Marine Honored in his Sacrifice

CPL. Brandon Strassler, USMC forwarded me this e-mail, and I think it exemplifies everything that is right about the honor held between all members of the Armed Services, whether they be Marines, Soldiers , or Sailors.

That this particular service member was not even human matters not a whit, he was still a MARINE. And as CWO Zorba stated, the reason WHY they are there is unimportant in the moment, what IS important is in the HOW they are there that matters above all else.

_Marine's K-9 honored: 'One of their own'_ ()
on Sunday, May 8, 2005. | Chief Warrant Officer PETER ZORBA Squadron
HMM-764
"The Moonlighters"

Dear Friends and Family,
Weather is beginning to climb up into the 100s now. With the heat comes the
dust and sandstorm season here, so many of our days are spent working and
living in an orange haze of diffused sunshine, wind, heat and dust that
gets everywhere and covers everything (aircraft, equipment, skin, teeth,
weapons, even the food in the chow hall).

We're all glad to be at the two-month mark, though it feels more like our
ninth. Hard to believe we were home at all sometimes … that we haven't been
here, doing what we do, day after day - night after night - all along.

Still,
morale is high and both the Marines and the helicopters we're flying are
doing well, in spite of long hours and high operational tempo.

It must go hand in hand. The busier you are, the faster time goes. The
faster time goes, the happier you are. Needless to say, most everyone tries to
stay as busy as possible. The days are long, but the weeks are flying (no pun
intended).

I want to tell you all a quick story, and if any of you know me at all …
then you know I love a good story! But I think this story says something about
the organization that I am a small part of here.

Last time I wrote, I described the Marines, in particular the young men and
women here with me that I am so proud to serve with. Many of you responded
that you were touched by the knowledge, or at least depiction of those
kids …
those heroes, for that is what they are. But, I digress.

A couple weeks ago I flew a night mission into Baghdad. Baghdad is a big
city, and where we actually flew into, whether it would be a name you'd
recognize from the news or not, doesn't really matter. Suffice to say that I
fly into Baghdad almost every night, but this night's mission was a special ASR
(assault support request).

A Marine K-9 had been killed and another dog wounded earlier in the day and
we were going there to pick up the dead K-9, the wounded K-9 and their
Marine handlers. How these Marines were attacked, whether in contact with
insurgents, a sniper or an improvised explosive device (IED), we never
knew.

We took off from our base and flew through the dark, star-clustered Arabian
night in an open combat spread. Radios crackled and disembodied voices
rolled through my helmet. The lights of small towns scattered across the desert
floor, illuminated with a green glow through my NVG's (night vision
goggles) passed below us and in and out of my gun sights.

At about midnight we were on short final into a small LZ with battle-scarred
concrete walls, and a hardened outpost with a bullet-riddled watchtower. As
we touched down, I hopped out the back of our helicopter and watched as our
"dash 2" landed about 40 feet to our 7 o'clock.

The LZ was dark and no one was around. Through my NVG's I could see the
Marines in the tower, and the bunker at its base, watching us, not really
thrilled to see us there, two phrogs spinning on the deck inside their
perimeter.
And why would they be, as we presented a wonderfully enhanced target for
indirect fire (IDF) in their position. Not that they don't take IDF often
enough,just that we were now an added bonus to any one already predisposed to 'throwing' a few mortars or RPG's our way … and theirs!

We waited. Five minutes. Ten minutes. After 15 minutes, with still no sign
of anyone, or any dogs, the crew began to grow a little uneasy:
"We're here, where the hell are they?"
"Goddamnit. Who the … is running this place."
"Do you see anybody, gunner?"
"Negative, sir."
"… If we don't see anybody soon, let's get dash 2 out of here, so at least
there's only one of us on the deck here in case we take incoming. You copy
that (call sign)."

"Roger that. Copy all."

Just then a door of a small industrial looking building about a hundred
meters away, opened and I could see Marines moving awkwardly towards us.
They were carrying their rifles with their outside hands and with the inside
hand, each held the edge of a body bag. Behind them followed another Marine with a shouldered rifle, MOLLIE pack, and his hands were on the back of the bag.

But this Marine's hands held the trailing edge of the body bag more like a
priest would grasp a holy cloth or a child his mother's hem, not really
supporting any weight, just holding on. As they loaded the body bag into our
bird, I took the young Marine's pack and stowed it and then got him buckled in.

The wounded K-9 and his handler were loaded into dash 2, and I sat back down
behind my .50 cal and called us clear of wires and trees as we lifted into
the night sky.

Once airborne, and on the go, out of the cultural lighting from over the
town, I looked back to see a big Marine, head in his hands, sitting in
darkness, bent over the body of his dog.

That was a long flight. My pilot, a battle-hardened colonel, kept asking me
"How's our boy doing?" as if he were a worried parent checking on his child.
He handed me back a small package of chocolate chip cookies he'd been
saving for the return to base. "Give 'em to our boy. He's had a rough day of it."

I unhooked my gunner's belt and walked back to the young man. I put my hand on his shoulder, handed him the cookies and patted him on the back, smiling
some compassionate, but dumb, smile there in the dark, 300' somewhere over Iraq.

What else can you do?

When we touched back down at our base, the passenger/cargo terminal sent a
vehicle out for the dogs. I helped the Marine with his gear, out away from
our rotor arc, and then ran back up the ramp and into our bird just in time to
grab one of the terminal guys as he was reaching for the body of our
Marine, thinking it was just another piece of gear.

"Hey man - what the … are you doing?!" I yelled over the engine noise.
"Leave him alone. We'll get him." The crew chief and I reverently bent over and
gently lifted the body bag and carried it out of our plane. I have carried
body bags before here, and I was surprised by how light this one was.
I placed my arms under the dog's body and gently set him down in the
vehicle. And then, out of sheer habit, I petted the poor pup on the shoulder … or maybe it was his hip. His body was still soft, even inside the thick black
polyethylene bag. As I turned to head back to my plane, I was face to face
with the fallen Marine's master.

The young corporal looked at me, he had seen me pet his dog, and I like to
think he saw how reverently we carried his fallen comrade's body out of the
plane, but maybe not. Red eyes and a sad, exhausted face were eclipsed by a
smile of gratitude as he shook my hand and mouthed the words "thank you."
Then he was gone and we were back on the plane and set to lift.

Once back on our line after we had shut down, we all sat down in the back.
It was quiet and no one really spoke until the colonel asked, "Did you take
care of our boy? Was he hurting too bad? Did you do right by the pup? Did
we treat them both with the respect and honor they deserved?"

"Yes sir." I replied...last year while we were here, the brevity code for
friendly KIA was "Angels." I don't know what it is this time for OIF III,
but it is a very fitting term. So I told the colonel "Yes, sir, the 'Angel' was
carried with respect, and treated with dignity and compassion, as was his
handler." The colonel liked this and we all agreed that the dog was a
Marine … as much as any of us.

But on another level, that kid had not only lost his partner, but he'd lost
his dog, a dog that I am sure he loved and that loved him back. That had
touched us all deep down somewhere, where you're still a kid yourself. We
were proud to have been able to do what we did for this fellow Marine, this
'Angel', and each of us would willingly do it again any time. That's what Marines
do.

I guess what I am saying is that we continually hear the question asked,
"Why we are here?"

I heard a Marine say yesterday, "Don't ask me why I am here.
I don't make our country's policy, I execute policy." I guess to me "why" is
not really that important.

What is important is 'how' I am here.

To me, this story illuminates that
"how," by showing the nature of the Corps that makes Marines what they are,
and in turn, is made what it is by the Marines devoted to it and to each other.
I am part of an organization that believed it was important enough to send
two helicopters and their crews, into harms way in order to retrieve the
body of one of its fallen. It made no difference that the Marine killed in
action was a dog and not a man, what does matter is that each one of us involved felt the same.

To us, not only was it a warranted and reasonable utilization of Marines,
Marine Corps assets and resources, but the risk to eight Marines and two
aircraft was far outweighed by a pervading sense of honor, commitment and
espirit de corps. Why else am I here, if not to go get a boy and his dog - both of whom are fellow Marines.

Few things here have been as important as that mission to me, and to my crew as well. That's "how" we are.

Semper,
Peter

Job Well Done, Chief Zorba, Semper Fi.

Is Mike Crook Dead?

Linda atSomething, and Half of Something has the scoop on a story about Michael Crook, the blogger alleged to be behind the disgusting site, Forsake the Troops.

It was alleged on the site that Mr. Crook had been severely beaten by two supposed members of the military for his inflamatory rhetoric against those that serve in the United States Armed Forces, and that he later died of those injuries.
The site was shut down to "prevent furthur violence against those that would speak the truth about the military".

Only problem is that the local police don't know anything about it....It appears that Michael is playing another one of his attention gathering games. I don't wish harm to any human being...but in Michaels case, I think I would be willing to make an exception. He has earned any approbation he receives through the dint of his own putrid actions.

HERE is the Marine Corps response via the Marine Times.

My Starwars Sign

Star Wars Horoscope for Taurus

You are a dependable creature, but you do tend to be stubborn. You like material possessions and love to win at games. You hate being bossed around or losing. You may succumb to your physical strength when upset. Star wars character you are most like: Chewbacca

Hmmmm; Maybe Mamamontezz was right when she called me a big hairy-assed ape?

Surprisingly, the attributes listed do fit me pretty well. Now if someone could just recommend a good barbor.....

"I'm OK; I'm waiting for my attorney"

This article written by Burt Springer is geared toward a LEO involved in a shooting incident, but it offers good advice that should be followed by ANYONE who has been put in the unenviable position of having had to utilize deadly force in self protection.

While Mr. Springer is correct in stating that:
"Remember, society does not like police shootings and you must expect to go through the steps society and your department dictates if you shoot someone."

As true as that is, society likes civilian shootings even less, and the common citizen doesn't have the support system that a LEO has after a shooting incident.

If you are involved in a shooting incident, the best thing you can do is KEEP your big trap SHUT. Retain counsel as soon as you possibly can, BEFORE answering any questions. When you are being questioned (with your legal counel present), keep your answers to the point, and don't elaborate. Do NOT offer any opinions and don't offer any information not specifically asked for in the questions put to you. Remember always that these people are not your friends.

Most investigators are fair and just trying to dispassionatly ascertain the the facts and circumstances surrounding the incident, but you can never be sure if you might have been unlucky enough to draw one of the "civilians have no right to protect themselves" GFW types, always assume that you have.

Tell the truth, and tell it like it was as simply as possible.

LISTEN to your attorney and follow his advice, that's what your paying him for.

Insurgents go high-tech

Seems that the insurgents Islamofacists are not adverse to using high tech training techniques in training their sniper forces to a higher effective proficiency. They are also using the net as a tool for recruitment of suicide bombers.

That's the "RoP" for you...obtain high technology; use it to spread hate and make your killing activities more effective.

Dog Blogging

Go ahead....MAKE MY DAY!

Mad Wife Disease

A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind
him and whacked him on the head with a magazine.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Laura
Lou written on it," she replied.

"Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Laura Lou was the name of one of
the horses I bet on," he explained.

"Oh honey, I'm sorry," she said. "I should have known there was a good
explanation."

Three days later he was watching a ball game on TV when she walked up and
hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet, which knocked
him out cold.

When he came to, he asked, "What the hell was that for?"

She replied, "Your horse called."

Newsweek: 15 fatalities Abu Gharib: 0 fatalities

Austin Bay Blog has an excellant post up on the Newsweek fiasco.

Comparing the results of this "reporting" to the incidents at Abu Gharib is, IMO, a pretty fair assesment. Abu Gharib was never anything more than a felony mistreatment of prisoners until the MSM blew it out of proportion in it's anti-American zeal. The people responsible are being justly punished for their parts in that sordid Fraternity hazing affair.

Now the shoe is on the other foot, and a heretofor respected member of the MSM went off without properly investigating the facts, and as a result, people DIED, and incalcuable damage has occurred in Western/Islamic relations.

With that one story, Newsweek has destroyed any of the good that the actions of our troops engaged in trying to help war torn nations rebuild their infrastructure, and has given the insurgeants Islamofacists in Iraq a whole new lease on life.

The MSM has derided the blogging community as not having the "checks and balances" that the Journalistic Community has. Not having an editor to review what we disseminate over the net, obviously, they say, there is "just too much chance that the average blogger will get it wrong", to the detriment of the community at large.

Well, Newsweek has those editors, so what went wrong? No blogger I know of has ever caused such a worldwide amount of damage to international relations.

"Newsweek Lied--People Died" is not just a catchy slogan, it's a truism.
They did not hold to the basic journalistic standards, and as a result, at least 15 people have DIED, hundreds more have been injured, and international relations have been set back at least a year. Will there be an outcry to impeach the Editor in Chief of Newsweek? Will those reporters be tried and punished appropriatly for their parts in this fiasco?

I won't be holding my breath.

Apologies

Apologies for the paucity of posting here recently. It just seemed as if everything I tried to write was a self-serving pity party, and that is one of the things I most despise.

I think that I may have had an interreaction between my "usual" meds and a couple of drugs I have been taking for a bout of Bronchitis; that coupled with the extreme stress we've been experiencing lately....is it any wonder that I'm a semi-basket case?

But that's not of value for the edification of you, the reader, on the weighty issues of the day, for which, I'm sure you come here to get MY take on. (/sarcasm off)

I apologise. I will endeavor to try to regain my interest in the world outside my personal sphere as soon as I can and once again gird myself for battle against the forces of Idiotarianism that seem to be so rampant today.

Just as soon as these meds wear off, and some of the problems are resolved.

I really appreciate all the thoughts and prayers you've sent my way, they really do give me hope of a better day dawning. Thank you all for that.

A day in the life

Go here for a video of one incident in the day of the life of a Marine in combat.

The video was filmed by some Air Force Joint Tactical Air Controllers
(JTAC) in Tal Afar, west of Mosul. They were with a Marine Advisor Support Team - they are attached to Iraqi units and help train their forces on a day- to-day basis - who where in a fairly sustained firefight in the streets of Tal Afar with about 3 Anti-Iraqi Forces (AIF). They set their video camera on the bumper of their Up-Armored HMMWV which they were using for cover.

You can hear them shooting back and forth. The rounds you can hear are from the Marines and the ones you hear pinging against the side of the vehicle with no accompanying pop are from the AIF.

When the JTACs say they just "fired rifle" that means the aircraft
just launched the Maverick. You can hear it come in and see it strike
the vehicle the AIF were using for cover.

Very Sad...

If condoms had sponsors, you might find them packaged
like these:

Sad! Very, very sad....................

THERE'S A LOT OF SADNESS IN THE WORLD!

Right now, as you read this, 17 Million Americans are having SEX!

And you're on the computer!

Just Damn! Update

I just got off the phone with the claims department of my Insurance carrier, wondering why they hadn't called about the demolition derby that took out all our transportation the other night.

The reason why they didn't call? The adjuster determined that since we didn't carry collision, and the driver that caused all this mayhem to our lives couldn't be identified,so it wouldn't be covered by uninsured motorist, that the claim wasn't actionable and just closed it. Didn't think it important that, just maybe, WE would like to know the status of the claim..... So tell me, just WHAT have I been paying this company $1,800 a year for the last ten years for?!

It's obvious that a party unknown caused the damage, and I always believed thats what uninsured motorist coverage was for. Had we been driving the vehicles, we could have at least gotten a plate number, and been covered, but because this POS got drunk and/or high, destroyed THREE parked vehicles at 3:15 in the morning, with no eye witnesses present, we don't get

ONE
RED
CENT.

I've got a call into my agent to see if there isn't something to be done....if not, I guess the next step is to try to get legal counsel, and file a complaint with the State Insurance Board.

In the meantime, we don't have any means of transportation, and no means of getting any in the near future, But I want to thank all of our friends that are keeping us in their prayers, with your moral support, we will endure and overcome, somehow, even if the path isn't clear at the moment.

I won't mention the name of the Insurance carrier....but if you Google "the Brickyard 400", you may just be able to guess..."Good Hands" indeed. Good at picking pockets, at the least.

UPDATE: Talked to my agent...lost what had been a very friendly business relationship. He informed me that under Indiana law, an insurance company is precluded from paying on an uninsured driver policy unless they are able to identify the driver.

I just wonder what special lobby got a law like that passed?

SO let's see...I followed the law and carried the most coverage I could afford to keep myself legal under the law.

I have lost my total transportation ablility to a (probably) drunk (and/or car thief) driver, ( who I'm almost positive didn't bother to waste HIS money on insurance) that didn't have the guts to face his actions, and the law precludes my carrier to make me whole because of that annonimoty(sic)?

I can only come to the conclusion that the inmates are truly running the nuthouse.

I will never buy insurance again. I'll just let the other poor sucker's carrier cover his loss, and deal with them trying to collect from me. By not saddleing myself with an outrageous monthly payment, I may actually have some small amount for them to collect. At the least, I'll have enough to pay at least one or two utility bills on time every month, for a change.

Hell, an extra $1800 a year is almost enough to put my daughter back into Parochial school, and her education is certainly more important than the mandates of the STATE machine that operate in a manner that only penalizes the law abiding and allows the guilty to go scott free.

They say that this type of law keeps the premiums down for the policy holders sheeple...but I ask you, if the blatent scofflaws go scott free and the law abiding are left without redress, just where is the balance and just HOW dies it benefit the sheeple to have a lower(?!?) premium that in the end provides them no protection from loss? That $18,000 I've payed over the last ten years on "insurance" could have made a real difference in my living conditions.

OK, I've got some of the anger vented out of my spleen.

I'm a hypocrit...I don't have the guts to "go it bare" on my car. I don't want to be the guy who puts someone else in the position I'm experiencing now, and fleeing the scene of an accident would betray everything I believed in while working as a LEO.

But as Dax Montana is wont to say: JUST DAMN! Maybe this venting will help me from getting another heart attack.

I now return you to your regular lives, thank you for the kind ear, and all the thoughtful words and prayers. They may be the only thing keeping me on the thin edge of sanity, and I bless you all for that.

Gun conrol debate

Abigail A. Kohn, an anthropologist trained at the University of California at San Francisco, bravely waded into the gun control battle with Shooters: Myths and Realities of America’s Gun Cultures (Oxford University Press). She has some pretty good insights into the gun control issue. I don't agree with all of her conclusions, but she has made a fair and honest assessment and provides a good starting point for discussion between the two sides.

I do feel that she doesn't adequately realize the utter intransegience of the GFW's ultimate goal of total confiscation of firearms, but maybe thats just my personal biases showing. I do agree that gun owners must show more public support for programs that have shown to be capable of reducing violent crime, and we as responsible gun owners have to do a better job in letting the public know that most gun owners do support more education/training in the shooting arts.

Most of us are NOT wild eyed radicals that believe that just because ownership is a right guarenteed to us by our Constitution, that that absolves us of providing/participating in the needed training to carry a weapon safely and in a socially responsible manner.

The problem is that the GFW's have used every opportunity to use any such program as a furtherance of their ultimate goal of the total banning and consfiscation of personal firearms. EVERY "compremise" made by responsible owners has led to furthur restrictions on their ability to own/carry a firearm, so is it any wonder that we look at any new compremises in rights vs restrictions with a suspicious eye? "Burned once, it's your fault, burned twice, and I have to take the blame" is the attitude, and it's a well founded fear, given past experience.

The programs, such as the Boston experiment mentioned, focused on the illegal side of the gun isssue, and thats where the focus SHOULD be.

The GFW's seem to want to focus much more on restricting the law abiding, knowing that they will only be successful in restricting the honest citizen, not the criminal. Unless and until they can honestly admit that fact, we can never have an honest and open debate.

Drugs and Illegals

We've all heard the apologists for the illegals coming over our Southern border; "they're just the poorest of the poor, seeking to make a better life for their families"--and many of them may fit that profile...but, as at least one of the brave men acting as a Minuteman found out, there is a significant percentage of these people that have no interest in anything but the high profits that drug smuggling brings. And that the situation in many sections of the border is an continous cycle of these vermin.

These illegals are not afraid of the border patrol, in fact, they USE the border patrol as a cost free "travel agency" to return to their bases in Mexico, thus increasing the amount of profit they make from their activity. In essence, YOU, the taxpayer, are helping fund their activities.

Read the story that Mr. Hart has to tell of the living conditions that honest citizens living near the border have to exist under; where a single mother has to "clear" her house before bringing her child in. Where another mother has to fear confrontations with smugglers parking in her driveway, making her for all practical intent, a prisoner in her own home after dark. Where the issue of gun control is a not debated among the residents of the community, where gun control as they understand it is truly "hitting what you aim at".

And for all it's touted restrictions, the Patriot Act doesn't even address the area.
(and for those trolls that want to know, NO, I am NOT in favor of many of the provisions of the act, but that is another post altogether.)

WE THE PEOPLE need to start to wake up to what is happening on our southern border. We need to hold the government accountable for border security, and if it continues to fail so miserably in it's duty to do so, WE must take that responsiblity on ourselves. They may call it vigilantism, but the fact remains that vigilanti's only arise when they feel that the appointed officials aren't doing the job expected of them.

The Minutemen ARE NOT vigilanti's; they are trying to bring attention to the utterly disgraceful ineffectiveness of the legal authorities BEFORE the need for vigilantism becomes almost a necessity for the safety of the legal residents of this part of the country.

Remember also, if the smugglers have made it such a routine to smuggle drugs into the country, just how much of a leap is it before they are contracted to bring in NBC agents for terrorist use?, indeed, in many cases, these agents would be EASIER to bring in, due to the very small amounts needed to pose a significant threat.

Effective border enforcement begins at the top levels, and President Bush has been severely inept in instituting the proper level of border enforcement. Indeed, it's almost as if he were trying to cater to the whim of those that encourage and profit from this travesty, aka Vincente Fox and his corrupt government, rather than upholding his Constitutional duties to keep our borders secure from foreign enemies. Make no mistake, Mexico is our enemy in this arena.

We need to hold his feet to the fire in this area. It is our duty as free citizens to become informed on this issue, and to hold our government responsible for doing what it was elected to do. And if the government doesn't, or can't do it, we must do it for ourselves.

We must come to realize that we are really engaged in a war that may determine the continued existance of our country, a war just as real and as serious as the war in Iraq, albeit an almost silent war up till now. If we don't fight it with all the determination and force we can muster, we may just as well concede defeat and prepare to wear the chains of those who would enslave us.

As for me and mine, we will never wear those chains, we will fight with all the weapons at our disposal, with words and education at the present time, and if/when it comes to it, with guns, in the final extreme. Better to perish fighting for an ideal than aquiesing to the whims of tyrants and the lawless.

Just DAMN it ALL

As Mamamontezz and I were trying to take our beauty sleep last night, we were disturbed by a horrendous crash out side our bedroom wall, followed by the sound of tires screeching in the night. I jumped up and looked out the window and didn't see anything but my car....but my car wasn't in the same position that I had parked it in....

I hurriedly got dressed and went out to see what was what. Our "driveway" is a wide strip of blacktop parallel to the street and our house. When we had gone to bed, we had had three of our vehicles parked there in a nice neat row. Now those three vehicles were pushed together in a very discouraging mass.

Some (probably drunk) jackass had struck the first car on the left rear, taking out the quarter panel and puling the rear end out about a foot; pushing it into the center of the second car (MY BAAAABY WAHHH!!) and crushing in the entire left side and springing the trunk, then pushing it into the left rear quarter panel of the third car, smashing it into the wheel well so hard that it sprang both the trunk and the hood. It's obvious that the frames of all three cars are sprung, and at the age of these cars, I am fairly sure that the insurance company will total all three of them. (And depending on if they use Blue Book value or replacement value, I may not get enough of a settlement from all three to buy one decent replacement.) The piece of scum that did this damage then just tore off into the night...I'm certain he had heavy damage to the front of his Oldsmobile, as he left his grill lying under my poor Chrysler, but it wasn't heavy enough to prevent him from leaving the scene like a bat out of hell. Must be the "luck of the drunk".

The police came to make a report, but without a witness and description of the vehicle, there isn't much more they could do than just take a report. The officer was called off taking the report twice on a run of "shots fired" in the near area...I wonder just how thorough a job that report will be, having been taken in between two other, more perilouse incidents. And no, I not faulting the officer one little bit. I've been in that position during my tenure as a LEO, and I know how things are prioritized, and that with the (lack of) information availible, my situation, understandably, went to the bottom of the list.

My insurance provider was supposed to have an adjuster out to look at the carnage between 8 Am and 2 Pm today...it's now 4:30 Pm, and I haven't heard from him yet....oh, well, I can't go anywhere anyway, since ALL of my vehicles are trashed. So I'm stuck in the citidal, with no liquid refreshment, and a rapidly declining number of cigarettes, and no means of replenishing them.

Think I'm, in a bad mood? You would be correct. This may be the straw the broke the camels back. I feel truly sorry for anyone that ticks me off in the slightest way in the next couple of days, I'm not sure that I am in an entirely sane state of mind, and I may just demonstrate the phrase "going Postal" on their person. Trolls BEWARE!

Mamamontezz did have one observation that eases the pain a little bit; had those cars not been parked there, that asshole may very well have driven his car into our bedroom. So it could have been worse. At least Mama and I are unscathed physically, if not mentally. Trust her to find the silver lining...now do you wonder why I married her?

Suspended for a phone call

This is a tough story to call. It's obvious that Kevin Francois broke the terms of the written policy of the school, and that the school officials stayed within the guidelines of that policy.

The question that should be asked is if the policy itself is flexable enough to meet the needs of both school discipline and student privacy rights. This is sort of an unusual case. I think that the punishment didn't fit the crime, but Mr. Francois did escalate the situation needlessly; that is what teenagers are wont to do, after all.

The policy should have been flexable enough to show Mr. Francois that he was in the wrong in some measure, but not where the school officials only had the two choices of arrest or suspension for the rest of the year to prove that point.

R.I.P. Col. Hackworth

Col. David Hackworth has died at the age of 74. I may not always have agreed with his views, but he was always forthright and willing to debate like a real man. His "let the chips fall where they may" style will be sorely missed in the public forum.

Rest In Peace Soldier Your Course is run, and Duty done, Pray that we see more of your type again.

The FBI Recruitment Process

The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were 3 finalists. Two men and a woman.

For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill Her!

The man said, "You can't be serious, I could never shoot my wife." The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home."

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, "I tried, but I can't kill my wife."

The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow. "This gun is loaded with blanks" she said. "I had to beat him to death with the chair."

MORAL of the story: Women mean business. Don't mess with them!!

The female of the species IS truly the more vicious.

Democratic Hyprocrisy

Mike at Sworn Enemy has a good resource post for those that wish to point out the hyprocrisy of Democratic Senators on the subject of judicial nominations. Partisianship is alive and thriving in the Beltway.

Thomas Sowell and plain speech

Acidman has a link to a Thomas Sowell piece that skewers the conventional PC thinking on Black "Ghetto Culture". He makes the case that this "Culture" is in reality a holdover of old Southern Redneck days and counterproductive to success in todays world.

And as usual, Acidman adds his own 2 cents worth of pithy observation to stir the pot a little:

Today, however, calling the typical black ghetto lifestyle self-destructive is a racist notion, and you're better off to keep your mouth shut about it. I won't. It IS a self-destructive lifestyle and nobody HAS to live that way. And I blame white liberals (who "love" black people) and race-mongers such as Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson for wanting to maintain the status quo.

Sweet Bejus! Get an education. Learn a skill. Don't get pregnant at the age of 16. Learn to hold a steady job, work hard and stay out of jail. Is that really so difficult to do? It must be.

A lot of blacks can't manage it. And there's no goddam excuse for that shit.

Can't put it any plainer than that; I believe that he's correct on all twelve points that he made in those three short paragraphs. With that conciseness, Rob proves yet again that there just may be some value to earning a degree in English.

The Guile of Age beats Youth Anytime

An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one
Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side.

He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.

The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000
ring and showed it to him. The old man said, "I don't think you understand,
I want something very special."

At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and
brought another ring over.

"Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler said.

The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with
excitement. The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it."

The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man
stated,"By check and I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll
write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds. I'll pick
the ring up Monday afternoon," he said.

Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man.

"There's no money in that account."

"I know." said the old man, "But can you imagine the weekend I had?"

Friendly Texan

A young woman, wearing a tight leather mini-skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket, was waiting for the city bus.

When the young woman stepped up to board the bus, she quickly realized that her skirt was too tight. The embarrassed young woman reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little. She hoped this would give her enough slack to climb the stairs onto the bus. Much to her chagrin, though, that didn't help.

A big Texan, who was in line behind the embarrassed, young woman, gently lifted her from the waist and helped her onto the bus.

As expected, the young woman went ballistic, and turned on the would-be hero, screeching at him, "How dare you touch me! I don't even know who you are!"

The big Texan drawled, "Well ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but since you were unzippin' my fly, I kinda figured that we was friends!"

What Weapon are YOU?

Desert Eagle You preferred a weapon with 43% power over speed and 72% range over melee.

You use a Desert Eagle. One of the most powerful handguns in production, the Desert Eagle is a heavy punch in a small package. Its reliability and speed are remarkable for a gun with such high caliber. Your enemies won't stand a chance as you fell them bullet by bullet.

Nice! I can think of a lot of waepons I'd rather NOT be, but the Desert Eagle sure isn't one of them!

Science as the new Religion.

In the argument over religion vs secular humanism I've been following for a the last few days, I took note when one person stated that "science should be the bulwark on which we place our faith; and run our political affairs".

To that person, I would point him towards this little fable over at The Bastard Sword.

As Victorio says in the tale: "... but when it comes to problems that depend on the battles between the tiniest of nature's whims your predictions grow quite uncertain."

Anyone that has observed human nature in action knows only one thing; it is the most whimsical of all nature's variables. Science has never, and WILL never be able to account for it's will-o-the-wisp nature in any consistant manner. It's true that the average response may be forecast, but when dealing in matters of life and death, it only takes one unforseen divergence from that average to negate the whole forecasted results.

Just Damn!

SlagleRock has a post up of a tribute written about the Military Spouse. I defy even the toughest 30 yr. noncom to read it and not get a little tear in his eye.

The spouses of our men and women at arms truly are unsung heroes that don't receive even a small fraction of the recognition they deserve. Thank you for reminding all of us Robbie.

Yet ANOTHER quizz

Surprise, surprise, surprise!

I was a little disappointed by some of the wording of the questions in this quiz, it was definately skewed from a partisan viewpoint. Yet the results are fairly accurate in my case, a little too high, but not by that much.

H/T to Wanda for the link

Joke of the Day

A woman having just realized that her dog could hardly hear, took it to the veterinarian. The vet found the problem was hair in it's ears and cleaned both ears and the dog could hear fine. The vet told the lady, that if she wanted to keep this from re-occurring, she should buy someNair Hair Remover and rub a dab carefully in the dog's outer ear, once a month.

The lady finds the Nair at a drugstore and when checking out, the druggist tells her, "If you're going to use this under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few days." The lady says "I'm not using it under my arms" to which the druggist says,"If you're using it on your legs, don't shave for a few days."

The lady says "I'm not using it on my legs either, and if you must know I'm using it on my schnauzer."

The druggist says "Then stay off your bicycle for a week."

Local Call

To THIS, All I can say is AMEN!

Second Joke of the Day

The Texas preacher rose with an angry red face. "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one, which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family."

No one moved.

The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me an admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression."
Again, all was quiet.

Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke.

"Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan.....

I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets!"

Joke of the Day

BUDS & HANGING BASKETS

A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with
a very sheer blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just pitched a
fit, telling her not to dare go out like that!

The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern
times. You gotta let your rose buds show!" and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes down stairs, and the
grandmother is sitting there with no top on.

The teenager wants to die.
She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and
that it is just not appropriate...

The grandmother says, "Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can
show off your rosebuds, then I can display my hanging baskets."

Happy Gardening!

Have A Great Day!

Quote of the Day

"Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington, and they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow!"

another one of those darned Quizzes..

Mmmm....actually this does pretty much fit me....except that I really don't hide my feelings that much, at least the surface ones. I'm somewhat quick to anger by stupidity, and I never hide that reaction.

More TRASH to be taken out...

I thought that Forsake the Troops was vile...but at least they are going after those capable of responding....THIS site though....so vile that words fail me.