Delftsman

The Old Dad

It's time for my update, and the news is still fabulous! When I walked into the room this morning for the first visiting hour, I was surprised to find that he looked even better than last night. And imagine my shock when he was awake and speaking (and more lucid than he is when he is well)! Unfortunately, that speaking continued, and when I went in between visiting times to accompany a visiting minister friend of the family, Dad was being a smart ass cranky cantankerous old man. It was nice to see that Dad was himself again.

At the second and third visiting hours, he continued to show improvement. His blood pressure, which is always sky high, is still fluctuating, and he's still on a very low dose of a medicine which controls his heart rhythm, but he's making tremendous strides. He's very tired and not sleeping, but by the end of tonight's last visiting time he was actually beginning to relax, and maybe even snore a little (but he'll deny that to his far-in-the-future dying day).

The fabulous night nurse Heather assured us that he is doing well, and she's fairly confident that he'll be moved to a regular room sometime tomorrow (just as soon as he's completely off the rhythm meds).

In all, it was a very positive day with good news and even a little joking and levity. Dad yelled at us to stop making him laugh as it causes his chest to hurt, but he certainly had a twinkle in his eye more than once. I want to again thank you all for your continued messages of support. They mean a lot. More news to follow...

Wednesday's News

I spoke to the nurse on the Cardiac Recovery unit this morning on the way to work. It appears he had a good night last night and was removed from the respirator to breathe on his own. She stated he was sitting on the edge of the bed having a sip of something at the moment, and was in pretty good spirits.

She also said he stands a pretty good chance of being taken out of the recovery area and put in a regular room on the CVPV unit. When that happens, I will have a phone number where he can receive calls which I will post on here.

Just bear in mind he's pretty weak. It will be a few days before he is fully awake and aware after the anesthesia. It takes a little longer when they effectively kill you on the table like they do in open-heart.

I'm not so sure about going up to spend much time with him. I'm not sure if it is a physical let-down from the stress, the rampage of perimenopausal hormones, or if I am fighting some sort of infection. Given the precautions they took before and after his surgery and the potential danger of infection, I would rather he be upset with me for not visiting Like I Should™ than wind up sick with whatever I may pass to him.

Updates as I have them.
______________________________________

(12:30) I went up to see the family on my miniscule lunch but none of them was there. I suppose they were all out getting a bite to eat. So I called the nurses' desk from the waiting room and got a small update.

He has been taken off the IV meds and seems to be doing quite well. They will be doing another test of his outflow before deciding whether or not to move him to a room on the CVPV floor.

I missed the morning visiting hour, will be working busily at my desk during the next one, and at home fixing dinner for everyone there during the later one. And no, there is no flexibility with visiting. It matters not that I work here and have for over 11 years and know how to behave in an intensive care unit. Be there on time or miss your opportunity.

But I digress.

Delft's is better. That is what is important.

Quick Update

Dad's condition is wonderful. I just spoke with his nurse and he is doing "very well". She is anticipating the imminent removal of his ventilator and his return to consciousness (such as it is). When last I saw him, late last night, he looked fabulous. The usual swelling that they prepared us for, and that he experienced greatly during his last trip to the OR, manifested only in his hands. When my mom (dad's ex-wife), Beth and I visited him last night, we were shocked and thrilled to find that Dad actually looked like himself! The surgeon and the nurses are very optimistic about both his surgical recovery and his long-term improvement in quality of life. We know that your thoughts are still with him and our entire family thanks you. I will continue to update as necessary, but feel free to write if you'd like more info.

Daddy is okay

This is Erin, Bert's daughter. I'm not sure if Lila has posted anything on here, as the hospital catagorizes Dad's lovely website as "pornography", but in case she hasn't, here are the details. Dad is out of surgery. He is doing well -- they re-grafted one of his previous bypass efforts, and inserted a ring around his mitral valve to restore function. We haven't seen him yet, but we're very optimistic as they did not have to do a blood transfusion and everything seems to be going well and according to schedule. Dad's family is here and we're having quite a nice time catching up and laughing at Dad's childhood antics. Thank you all for support of my Daddy. I appreciate it, and I know that he does too, more than he can (and will) say. If you have any questions, please email me at erinm26@hotmail.com (please put dad's name in the subject line so I don't delete it as spam) and I'll try to respond as soon as possible. Again, thank you for caring.

So Far Today

We got here at 5:55am.
They admitted him immediately.

Beth arrived from her hotel and joined us in Delft's holding room. Her eyes are striking, and she has a very genuine kindness about her.

The tech completely denuded his body (beard and scalp excluded). He looks pretty naked that way. Don't say anything but I kinda like it....

A more emergant case pushed his back to 9:30am.

At 9:10 he was taken to prep.

At 9:30 he was taken to surgery.

At 12:40 I got a call from Sister to tell me that they just got him open and on bypass. Because this is his second open-heart, opening the chest is much more difficult and involved and took a considerable amount of time. They don't expect him to be out of surgery for at least 3 more hours, potentially much longer.

I will update this as I can.

French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney

(AP), Paris, March 5, 2003

The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney. The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists.

WAY TO GO, ARI!

A letter from the excellent Ari Fleischer, former Bush White House spokesman, to Jimmy Carter, the former peanut farmer and America's most inept, most destructive President (post Nixon media coup d'etat) who never met a West hating Islamist he didn't kowtow to;

The Honorable Jimmy Carter
The Carter Center
453 Freedom Parkway
Atlanta, Georgia 30307

Dear Mr. President:

I just read the transcript of your interview with the German magazine, Der Spiegel, in which you accuse Israel of launching an "unjustified attack on Lebanon."

Even after the interviewer reminded you that Israel was the first to get attacked, you charged Israel with lacking "any legal or moral justification for their massive bombing of the entire nation of Lebanon."

As someone who served in the White House as a spokesman for a President, I am reluctant to criticize another President, but in this instance my conscience compels me to do so.

Mr. President, your words are music to Hezbollah's ears and your message is a blow to long-term peace.

Just as you underestimated the threat of the Soviet Union in the 1970s, you underestimate the threat of radical Islam today. Your condemnation of Israel, the victim, only encourages Hezbollah, the attacker, to bide its time and attack again.

Ahmed Barakat, a member of Hezbollah's central council, last week told the Qatari newspaper as-Watan that "Today Arab and Muslim society is reasonably certain that the defeat of Israel is possible and that the countdown to the disappearance of the Zionist entity in the region has begun. The triumph of the resistance is the beginning of the death of the Israeli enemy."

I was raised a Democrat but I changed parties in 1982 because I believed your policies and the nuclear freeze movement invited increased Soviet militarism and adventurism. President Reagan's military build-up and credible threat of the use of force helped bring about the demise of Communism and brought freedom and a better life to hundreds of millions in Central and Eastern Europe. It also secured a lasting peace.

I'm sorry to see you articulate about Hezbollah and its aggression the same weak world-view that encouraged Soviet aggression. As Ronald Reagan showed us, peace through strength is the only formulation understood by those bent on destruction.

I understand your longing for peace and your fond hope that Hezbollah can be reasoned with. However, when you call Israel's defense "an attack", when you call what is justified "unjustified", and when you call morality immoral, I conclude that the pro-defense, strong foreign policy lessons of the 70s and 80s remain unacceptable to you. Also, when you criticize Israel for targeting so-called "civilian" areas in Beirut and other areas where Hezbollah hides its operations, the result would be - if Israel listened to you - the creation of safe havens from which more violence and rocket attacks would be planned and launched.

Sadly, Hezbollah today is planning its next war. For the sake of peace, Israel deserves your praise, not your condemnation.

Sincerely,

L. Ari Fleischer

stolen borrowed in it's entirety from Atlas Shrugs (it just HAS to be passed around!)

This says it!

I was reading Neil Boortz roday and saw the perfect analogy to refute those that seem to think that all we need to do is talk/negotiate with the Islamic Facists causing all the trouble in the world today:

"A hunter was hunting in the woods when he came upon a bear. He was just about to fire when the bear held up his paw and said "After all, Mr. Hunter, all you want is a fur coat, and all I want is a full stomach, can't we sit down and negotiate this problem?".

So they sat down and talked it over, and indeed, it ended up that the bear was right; the hunter ended up inside a fur coat, and the bear had a full stomach."

WHY can't the appeasers see that under some circumstances, negotiation just isn't a viable option?

Negotiation implies that there is some middle ground that works out to the benefit of both of the parties involved, but when one or the other party of the negotiation has it's goal the total destruction of the other party, there really is nothing to negotiate...unless of course, you consider the method and timeline of your destruction as a valid negotiating position.

There is where the appeasers are mistaken; they seem to believe that the rhetoric of the IslamoFacists are merely talking points instead of the stated end goal of the process and until they start to learn that the enemy is honestly putting forth their goals, and reacting to those stated end goals. we are in serious trouble. You not only have to take the words of your opponent into account; you have to take the ongoing actions of that opponent into the process.
When you have an opponent that consistently negotiates with words in one manner, and acts in the opposit manner, can you truly be said to be negotiating?

And in this instance, the opponent isn't even doing that; the Islamofacists have repeatedly and CLEARLY stated that their goal is the destruction of the West; AND consistently committed acts in furthurance of that goal.

To believe that we are in a state other than in a world war to determine the fate of our civilization is to be naive beyond all belief. That so many of us in the West truly seem to be that naive is disheartening, to say the least.

Back Home

I got back home last night at 1700, feeling like fidos's ass; but bouyed up by all the support that everyone one of you has shown me. I cannot express just how much that show of support has meant to me over this last week or so.

It was a real blow to get home and find that a virus of some sort has wiped out half of my periphial components/drivers...(thank god I saved my old keyboard!) I'm still looking to get a full functioning mouse to be fully back, but at least I can navigate in a limited manner, albeit a clumsy one.

I just talked to the cardiac surgeons nurse, and they want me to come into the office at 0945 Monday to discuss just what Dr. Shearer has determined is the proper course of action; and to come in at 0600 Tuesday to be prepped for surgury at 0800.

If anything like the last time, I'll be in post surgical care for about 3 to 7 days; then a two month rehab at home.

The speed with which thay are moving on the surgury does have me a bit scared...hell, to be honest, I'm terrified. they have put the fatality risk of the surgury at 35-45%..my bypass procedure was rated at 5-10%, so I think I have a good reason to feel a little twinge of fear. I have one of the best surgeons in the Midwest and one of the best Cardiologists in the US looking after me though, so that does help ease my mind that I'm in good hands on the technical end of things, and all the support you've shown me in th last week assures me that the the spiritual/emotional end of it is in even better hands; so as LC Brendon might say "no worries, mate!"

More to follow as I learn of it. Hopefully, Beth and JB can find the time put up a few posts here in my absence to keep everything running.

So now it is Thursday

Delfts tried to call me at work before I got here, so as soon as I got in I called up to his room.

The cardiac surgeon came up yesterday evening and had a long talk to him about his heart and its current condition. One of his by-pass grafts is completely blocked. The others have blockages of various degrees. There is a possibility that the one graft can be opened, and as a prelude to that the surgeon checked Delft's legs for any potential grafting material. I believe he only harvested from the left leg last time, so his right leg should have plenty available.

Before they can make this decision, however, they want to see exactly what is happening in and around his heart. While I was on the phone with him, the transporters came to take him to the cardiac labs for a nuclear study.

I will call up on my break at 9:30 to speak to the floor nurse and see what is planned from this point. There is a possibility that he will be released today then brought back for the surgery as soon as next week. He thinks that if he is released he can just hop in his car and drive himself home. I may need to ensure he is unable to do that. I think I can find the solinoid.

Last night when I left, they were talking about sending him home with a telemetry monitor. It would run periodic strips, track blood pressure and blood oxygenation, and would require a download of this information on a daily basis. I'm certain that if they release him today, this will be coming home with him.

Working throughout this situation has not been the easiest, but no one said it would be. At least it gives me some focus and keeps me out of his room. That would have been a very bad thing.

Subject: Military Friends!

FRIENDS: Never ask for food
MILITARY FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Call your parents mom and dad.

FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, Damn...we f@#$ed up...but that shit was fun!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours.

FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'm home!"

FRIENDS: Are for a while.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "Bitch, you better drink the rest of that, you know we don't waste... That's alcohol abuse!!!"

FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will knock them the f@#k out!!

FRIENDS: Will ignore this.
MILITARY FRIENDS: Will forward this...

h/t j. McLeod

Tuesday Update

Delfts received flowers from the Progeny yesterday. Deep red marbled roses mixed with yellow roses. I understand they are beautiful.

We do not know when he will be released because there are treatment options that need to be considered and decisions that need to be made. Because he has been relatively noncompliant, his options are fewer and will lean more toward "quality of life" and away from increased longevity.

He has managed though institutionally enforced compliance to lower his blood pressure to one we would all be proud of, and has lost the fluid build-up that occurred after he arrived here last Wednesday. He has not, however, been able to shed any of the fluid that he was carrying when he arrived, an amount which was considerable. They have ruled out any kidney dysfunction and are treating it medically, even though it appears that he is still experiencing considerable edema even under treatment.

He is light headed and dizzy most of the time, a condition he attributes to his newly normal blood pressure. He has to get used to it, however, because the pressure levels he is used to have severly compromised his heart both structurally and functionally.

I don't know what the trans-esophogeal cardiac ultrasound told them yesterday. Delfts doesn't either. All he could tell me was that his care team was going to meet to discuss his options then come to him with their decision.

It sounds to me as though they are not going to give him many options on this. Perhaps that is the best. He tends to always go with the option that requires the least amount of effort on his own part. This time I do not believe that will happen.

In the meantime, if you want to talk to him, I know he would welcome your calls. You can reach him at the hospital toll-free number of 1-866-338-2345 and asking the operator for extension 80493.

Computer error...

I was having trouble with my computer so I called Harold the computer guy to come over.

Harold clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. When he finished, he gave me a bill for a minimum service call.

As he was walking away, I called after him, "So, what was wrong?"

He replied, "It was an ID ten T error."

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, "An ID ten T error? What's that, in case I need to fix it again?"

Harold grinned. "Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"

"No," I replied.

"Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it out."

So I wrote down.

I D 1 0 T

Life the way it should be...

Well, I went to see Delfts last night bearing sushi (minus the soy sauce, too much sodium) and fresh purple plums. He was walking the hallway, his third walk of the day and a big part of his cardiac rehab.

He was happy to get the sushi. The HeartSmart diet is going to take some getting used to, and it's not as satisfying as he'd like, not by a long shot. He'll get used to it, or he'll go hungry.

You know, it isn't as though I don't cook healthy. Both jane and michael also take great pains to eat sensibly and both cook very healthy meals. You have to go out of your way to eat poorly at our house. I guess the secret is to not use sodium-laden condiments as a side dish.

So this weekend I plan on going through the kitchen, evaluating each condiment, the Thai peanut chilli sauce, the Sweet Ginger Chilli sauce, the Mushroom Soy, A1, Worchestershire sauce... I love cooking with very small amounts of them, just to enhance an already good dish. But since he has no self control and insists on slathering these things over every dish as though they needed them, I have no choice but to either put them where he cannot get to them or toss them out entirely.

I don't anticipate him being sent home anytime today or Saturday. He probably won't get home before Monday. The found what he is calling a "Collapsed Valve" on his heart, although I'm sure he meant that it has prolapsed. Not a good thing, but fixable if he can show that he won't squander this opportunity for a life-extension the same way he has all of the previous ones they have given him.

In the meantime, since I know he likes to post the little jokes and things he is sent in email, here's one I got today that sounded pretty good.
_______________________________________

Life the way it should be!

I think the life cycle is all backwards.

You should die first, you know, start out dead, get it out of the way.

You wake up in an old age home, feeling better every day.

You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.

You work 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.

You drink alcohol, you party, you're generally promiscuous (hey, you've only got a few years left, what's the big deal?) and you get ready for High School.

You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a baby, then, you spend your last 9 months floating peacefully with luxuries like central heating, spa, room service on tap, larger quarters everyday, and then you finish off as an orgasm!
______________________________________

Thank you all so much for your kind thoughts and prayers. Thank you to the ones of you who took the time to call him to talk. Thank you for the time you have taken to let us know how much you think of him. If I can get him well enough for Tampa the next time, he'll be there.

Mamamontezz

Here we go yet one more time...

We are waiting now to find out which room on which unit they will admit Delfts this time.

One cannot ignore medical advice and direction in the case of congestive heart failure and not expect permanent and potentially critical repercussions. One cannot continue to smoke a pack a day, consume insane amounts of sodium, refuse even minimum activity, and lubricate with Bloody Marys without losing ground on a cummulative, chronic and eventually fatal condition.

Delfts is at St Vincent Hospital in Indianapolis

St Vincent Hospital
2001 West 86th Street
Indianapolis, IN 46260

I do not know how long his stay will be. I will post as I find out.

Mamamontezz

religious truths

During these serious times people of all faiths should remember these 4
religious truths:

1. Muslims do not recognize Jews as God's chosen people

2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah

3. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian
world.

4. Baptists do not recognize each other at Hooters.

H/T to Catfish

1939 Redux

It's five minutes to midnight. The time to strike Iran is now. Atlas Shrugs lays it all out in this post. It's no longer a question of IF there is to be a war, the only question is exactly WHEN; and how bloody it will be. The sooner we go on the offensive/pre-emptive, the better it will be for all the parties involved.

Joke of the day

A little boy came down to breakfast. Since his family lives on a farm, his mother asked if he had done his chores.

"Not yet," said the little boy.
His mother told him no breakfast until he did his chores.Well, he was a little pissed, so he went to feed the chickens,and he kicked a chicken. He went to feed the cows, and he kicked a cow. He went to feed the pigs, and he kicked a pig.He went back in for breakfast and his mother gave him a bowl of dry cereal.

"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asked.

"Well," his mother said, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk."

Just then, his father came down for breakfast and kicked the cat halfway across the kitchen.The little boy looked up at his mother with a smile, and said:Are you going to tell him, or should I?"

H/t to GuyK

Hillary Busted

Hah !!! It's not what you thought.

Just when you were wondering if medicine would ever invent "Anti-Viagra" for satyriasis.

Revealing Hillary Clinton bust unveiled

Fri Aug 11, 2:09 PM ET

It's a bust of Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton — in more ways than one.

Just when you thought the press and others couldn't suck Hillary's toe cheese enough in orgasmic delight, along comes an artist that sniffs her jock strap.

Cast in resin and bearing ample cleavage, a bust of the New York Democrat was unveiled this week at the Museum of Sex in Manhattan.

The Museum of Sex also features a humidor of cigars from the Oval Office Circa 1995.

Calling his creation "The Presidential Bust of Hillary Rodham Clinton: The First Woman President of the United States," artist Daniel Edwards said he wanted to depict the 58-year-old Clinton "with her head held high, a youthful spirit and a face matured by wisdom."

Now that is the most blindingly assinine "creative" thought you ever had. It's tough out there being an artist. You not only have to have talent and a lack of reality, but are willing to make a fool of yourself to anyone living outside Manhattan.

You are truly an artist now, pardon us while we finish cleaning coffee off of our keyboards.

Indeed, while the former first lady's face is shown with a few wrinkles, Edwards cast her in a low-cut floral dress that reveals her shoulders and chest.

"Her cleavage is on display, prominently portraying sexual power which some people still consider too threatening," Edwards said.

The artist, finished with chowing Madame Cankles "package protector" continues on, with a tongue bath of her ass crack.

Sex and Power do NOT come to mind when I think of Hillary. The vision is more like the "Skanky Lesbians of New York" DVD, with delusions of grandeur and the power of being shrill enough to crack china at 1000 yards.

Edwards has a knack for creating pieces that attract publicity — his last work, unveiled at a gallery in Brooklyn, depicted Britney Spears on her knees giving birth on a bearskin rug.

Another national treasure of art. Any bets that he receives funding from the National Endowment of the Arts?

This p0rnography disguised as creative expression is their specialty, as no one would ever buy this steaming piece of shit. Obvioulsy from the same crowd of hopelessly batshit lefties that brought us crucifixes in urine.

Clinton is widely thought to be considering a presidential run in 2008 but has not declared her plans. She has not commented on the bust, her office said Friday.

You gotta be joking me......"but she has not declared her plans". Here's a clue you worthless, pandering, talentless snot weasel. She had plans for the Oval Office when her worthless husband first planted his butt in the office chair and unzipped his fly.

Just in case you thought it was safe to finish reading this, here have a gander:

Stay tuned, I'm sure his next "fabulous" work will feature Rosie and Cynthia McKinney doing the horizontal mambo "Double Dilly Style"

Let's hope Mr. Edwards has a lifestyle choice that results in a lack of progeny, as he's wasting valuable oxygen as well as creating crap with his hands and colon. Hey, maybe he does have a unique talent.

You are now free to move about the residence, vomiting uncontrollably.

BOO- Yah!

Kim du Toit calls for us to once again become "a nation of riflemen".

Lance Cpl. Galen Wilson, 21, of Fort Lauderdale, Fla., holds his rifle at a base in Ramadi, 70 miles west of Baghdad, July 20.

LCpl. Galen Wilson exemplifies that credo. A designated marksman for his infantry platoon, LCpl Wilson has twenty credited sniper kills, with forty more 'probable' kills. Every one of those men had only one goal in mind: to kill as many of our soldiers as they could. As long as we have men such as LCpl Wilson that are ready,capable, and willing to do the dirty work of war, we will be a strong nation.

25 arrested, 5 still sought

Well, the Brits foiled a plot that had the potential to equal the deaths of 9/11, only spreading the pain over 10 airlines, most flying between the U.S. and Britain.

Check out the MSM and you would never know the religious affiliation of the plotters (can't have that nasty profiling, don't you know).

Another two points to be made. Remember all that hullabaloo about how it was so evil that the national agencys charged with the protection of our security were monitering international phone calls? Seems that a program such as that was instrumental in uncovering the plot before it could be carried out, and second, it seems that most of the members involved in the scheme were "home grown" in Britain. Seems that all that tolerance of the radical imams in Britain has resulted in nutureing a nest of vipers in the society that they wish to destroy.

We as a society count individual freedom as our greatest strength, and it is, BUT we as individuals and a society at whole have to realize that that same freedom and tolerance for "diversity" can also be our greatest weakness.

There IS such a thing as too much tolerance, when that tolerance includes those that would destroy the society that practices it.

Do we have to jealously guard our individual freedom from all quarters?
YES !!
But we also must be willing to sometimes risk that individuality to possible abuse to protect the greater society as well.

It's all a question of safeguards and matter of degree. And the argument over those are something that should never be totally settled, but always reexamined and adjusted to conditions, with the default position being that it's better to be free than totally secure. It's a thorny path to tread, but it's one we have to tread if we are to survive as a free and, yet still as secure as possible, society.

Gender

EVERYTHING HAS A GENDER

You may not know this but many nonliving things have a gender...

*Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

*Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

*A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.

*A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.

*Sponges are Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

*A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on.

*A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

*An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

*A Hammer is Male , because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

*A Remote Control is Female. Had you fooled! You thought it'd be male , didn't you? But consider this - it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!

H/T to Catfish (who else?! lol)

Senate Vote

38 SENATORS VOTED TODAY AGAINST MAKING ENGLISH THE OFFICIAL LANGUAGE OF AMERICA .

HERE THEY ARE.

Akaka (D-HI)
Bayh (D-IN)
Biden (D-DE)
Bingaman (D-NM)
Boxer (D-CA)
Cantwell (D-WA)
Clinton (D-NY)
Dayton (D-MN)
Dodd (D-CT)
Domenici (R-NM)
Durbin (D-IL)
Feingold (D-WI)
Feinstein (D-CA)
Harkin (D-IA)
Inouye (D-HI)
Jeffords (I-VT)
Kennedy (D-MA)
Kerry (D-MA)
Kohl (D-WI)
Lautenberg (D-NJ)
Leahy (D-VT)
Levin (D-MI)
Lieberman (D-CT)
Menendez (D-NJ)
Mikulski (D-MD)
Murray (D-WA)
Obama (D-IL)
Reed (D-RI)
Reid (D-NV)
Salazar (D-CO)
Sarbanes (D-MD)
Schumer (D-NY)
Stabenow (D-MI)
Wyden (D-OR)

Remember these Senators when YOU vote in November !

Jessie and the Appliance Store

After his tour of duty in New Orleans......

Jesse Jackson was in Sears.
He was there to protest the fact that all the washing machines were white.

So the clerk called the store manager, who asked,
"What's the problem here, Reverend?"

Jesse pointed at the machines and loudly bemoaned the fact
that all of them were white.

The manager replied, "Well, Reverend, it's true that all the
washing machines are white, but if you'll open the lids,
you'll see that all the agitators are black."

Youth Culture in the UK

U r sckd: worker fired by text message

No you are reading it correctly. That is exactly how the headline was written.

Fri Aug 4, 11:38 AM ET via AFP newsfeed

A company has defended its decision to sack one of its staff by text message, claiming it was keeping in touch with youth culture.

I'm still having trouble with the way my mind reads the headline. But it's part of the YOUTH CULTURE I suppose.

Katy Tanner, a 21-year-old sales assistant, received the message while she was off work with a migraine, the South Wales Echo newspaper said Friday.

The text message said: "We will not require your services anymore...Thank you for your time with us."

Now isn't that just sweet. How stunningly brave of management to FIRE an employee via text message, it avoids all the angst of doing THEIR freakin' JOB which, oh by the way, includes FIRING people. Be adults and suck it up, or is making somebody cry too much for YOUR personal self-esteem. We don't want to hurt anybody's feewings now do we? This points to a much, much bigger problem. Too many people don't want to make hard decisions and even worse ACT on them. This is a MAJOR ISSUE we are facing in the west. We are fat, lazy and want somebody else to face problems and deal with them. Can an adult who can't do an unplesant, but necessary task like discharging a bad employee, defend themselves against a threat to their life? Hell no. They can't even be COMFORTABLE with having their government do that. They don't want to deal with anything unpleasant, nevermind it might be a threat to their very existence.

"I don't think it's right to just text someone. At least they should have talked to me face to face," Tanner said.

Yep, just like the Trumpster, call you in (when you bother to show up) to the office. "Katy YOU'RE fired !!!" See.... three words and it's over.

"You're not allowed to text in sick, you have to phone. The fact that they texted me is a bit of double standards."

Double standards and yellow bellies.

Several senior staff members at Blue Banana, a body-piercing and jewellery shop based in Cardiff, defended the decision.

Of course, because they're all cowards. Defend the piss-poor decision you made anyway you want, but we know their problem.

But company director Jon Taylor added that an internal investigation was underway to see if "the ultimate action was ideal".

Keep backpedaling Jon, It won't do you any good. Let's just hope some jihadi goatfucker doesn't try to kidnap your ass. Will you Text Message Scotland Yard? Hopefully you are well trained in cell phone self-defense. Ahh the "Cell Phone Jihadi Defense Technique™" Give us a "text" when you try it, hopefully your eyes (in your severed head) will be able to see the phone in your hands. Tapping in the message could be a probem as well, but maybe muscle memory will do the trick.

The retailer claims it tried to reach Tanner directly "five or six times" and passed on a message through her boyfriend before the text was sent.

Keep backpedaling away, do mind the train coming up behind you. I'll just pull something out of my ass here, maybe knock her up? (Ed. Note--it's a british thing-means to pay a visit to someone's residence. )

And store director Ian Besbie added that the dismissal method was fair because texting was a part of "youth culture".

"We are a youth business and our staff are all part of the youth culture that uses SMS (text) messaging as a major means of communication," he said.

The company employs about 120 people in Britain, many of them aged under 21.

If this is an indicator of your business paradigm, good luck. I doubt you'll keep those employees working and the business open, let alone grow without some adults in charge, and I don't classify an adult based on age alone. Obviously Mr. Besbie doesn't fit that category either way. I imagine your investigation will detemine that a *stern look* should be SMS messaged to the "senior staff".

The U.K. continues swirling down the toilet bowl of relevancy. Churchill spinning in his grave no doubt. The Brit "Stiff Upper Lip" succumbs to the "Quivering Chin".

Things that make you go HMMM...

Here's some Aviation History everyone should probably know:

You may remember that on July 8, 1947 , witnesses claim an unidentified object
with five aliens aboard crashed on a sheep-cattle ranch just outside Roswell , New Mexico .

This is a well known incident that many say...
has been profusely covered up by the Air Force and the US government.

However....... what you may NOT well know is that on March 31, 1948 -
exactly nine months after that historic day, Al Gore was born.

That piece of information clears up a lot of things.

What They are Proudest of.

A Marine footlocker plopped itself down with a ‘THUNK!’ on my porch today, with the help of a postal worker, who insisted on helping me lug it’s sandy, battered dark-green plastic self over my threshold.

The weighty locker’s arrival was not a surprise, as I had received an overseas call just days before from the young Marine Lance Corporal, a friend stationed in Fallujah, who had asked that I be ready to receive it in lieu of his wife who attends school out-of-state. There is only one correct response to that kind of request. ‘Absolutely!’

“It’s gonna be heavy”, he warned. Like I care. He and his unit are being redeployed stateside at the end of this month, having (God willing) survived 7 more months in the land of sun and fun that is Iraq. His buddy’s locker should also show up here in a day or two. I’ll drag it inside and add it to the pile of suitcases, golf clubs, book boxes and odds and ends of Marine regalia that currently litter most of my spare room.
One pair of spare desert boots sits perched atop the whole heap. There is always room for more.

I make it a point to ask them, these young men who represent the best of us, the wall of safety/blanket of security/ call it what you will, that we are so fortunate to have guarding our nation - one particular question when they come home. I fully intend to ask it of these two in the very near future.

No. It’s not the 6-million dollar question. ‘Didya kill anyone?’ They will get that one from every corner; the idly curious, the morbidly fascinated, concerned family members, those who only use it to condemn - and they each will have to respond to that question often enough for me not to ever want to add to that burden.

Many of them hadn’t heard my question before . One even expressed his amazement that ‘nobody else had ever asked him that’, and he’d been back nearly a year from his 3rd deployment in 4 years.

What I ask is this: ’What did you do over there that you are proudest of?’

To a man, they have yet to give the same answer. The first response I received, a newly-minted Sgt. was quietly honored to be put up for a Bronze Star with a V for Valor, but he never did say what he’d done to have achieved that and it felt wrong to press. Another, a Corporal, had formed a close bond with an Iraqi interpreter who worked and lived at the camp where they both worked, it not being safe for the ‘terp’ to live off base with his family.

JC, the Marine who got me involved with this ‘fine mess’ that is the Marine Corps when he began moonlighting at my store, and who I thank nightly in my prayers for granting me the opportunity to get to know these young men and women, was both proud and relieved that he’d brought his whole Squad home, SAFE, from walking over 70 ground patrols in Ar Ramadi, one of the most dangerous cities in Iraq for our troops. Most of his men even thanked him, and said JC had been a hardass, but they understood now, why.

A 23 year-old LCPL, shot once, hit by an IED in his right arm and back, and who will probably be having PT for the rest of his days, - but who willingly went out on 2 more deployments after that even though he could’ve been medically discharged - said he and his buddies pulled some young Iraqi school kids out of a building that had caught fire. All suffered some burns as a result - but they got those kids out.

A Sergeant I work with now on Base, who happens to be a gifted artist, said he felt like the time he spent with local children, handing out school supplies and the cliché but oh, so important beanie babies and candy, and just being a sort of pied piper to the little ones, was something he still carried with him and always would. (He told me that when the big kids would snatch of the smaller kids freshly distributed soccer balls or stuffed animals, he would ‘make sure’ that the little ones would get them right back!)

Another Marine, who left just this Friday on his second deployment, said the first go ’round he and his men ’adopted’ one special little girl and they checked up on her, and made sure her family had things they needed. They were always hospitably received, and he raved about the goodness of their hot chai and warm bread! He is hoping to be able to hear of/see her again. Long shot, but….
One’s unit laid the most communications equipment/cable in the history of the Marine Corps. Endless miles of the stuff. Yet another made sure his men got what they needed, supply-wise, becoming quite proficient at wheeling and dealing with both the locals and other logistics folks so that his unit didn’t have to go lacking, ever. One time one of his CPLs busted a file cabinet that he’d been putting together for a higher-up, who was furious. In a panic, the beleaguered CPL came to him to pay for another, but the PX was all out. It just so happened that the filing cabinet was the exact same one he himself had bought earlier in the week, though, so he gave the CPL his, gratis. Assembled and ready to go.

----------------------------

Some knew their answer to my question right away. Several gave me their responses a day or so later, after they’d mulled it over. I thought it spoke to their achievements in the sandbox that they had so many things to choose from that it took some thinking to single out the ‘best’.

I came into this from the outside world, having a Dad who served, but no one currently. These Marines I’ve met through my work; either off, or now on, Base. If you ever wonder about the young troops of today, and whether they have what it takes to commit and fight, and achieve victory in this War, I can answer that by asking myself my own question:

What am I proudest of?

THEM.

Author,Author!

Decrepit Old Fool tries his hand at writing a bete noir short story, and I think that you will find it equal to the best of any published author.

Yalla YA Nasrallah!

Here's whats waiting for you if you dare to show yourself!

If you care to care to bask in more of the pulcritude that the IDF has, GO HERE.

To GuyK.

Lebanon ~ Cease Fire, or Appeasment?

Caroline B. Glick has something to say about the proposed cease fire in Lebanon...I hope that the leaders of Israel and here in the U.S. take her advice to heart....otherwise, we're in for a struggle that will make Iraq look like a Sunday School outing...

Family Relations

to KeesKennis for the pics

The way men Think

As usual, Elisson cuts through the bulls**t and honestly shows what we men are ACTUALLY thinking when we invite you lovely ladies over for a "romantic home cooked meal".

A little political comparison

As usual, someone else found it first, and I'm relegated to just passing it along. I'm just blessed that I have so many blog-friends that I can rip this stuff off of borrow from for the edification of my fellow citizens.

to KeesKennis

Sign of the Times

to Catfish

Another Blond Joke

A man got on a bus with both of his front pants pockets full of golf balls.

A blonde kept looking quizzically at him and his bulging pockets,

Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls."

The blonde continued to look at him thoughtfully and finally asked,
"Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"

Another stolen borrowed joke

There was a tradesman, a painter named Jack, who was very interested in making a dollar where he could. So he often would thin down his paint to make it go a wee bit further. As it happened, he got away with this for some time.Eventually the local church decided to do a big restoration project. Jack put in a painting bid and, because his price was so competitive, he got the job.

And so he started, erecting the trestles and putting up the planks, and buying the paint and thinning it down with turpentine. Jack was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly done, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder. The sky opened and the rain poured down, washing the thin paint from all over the church and knocking Jack off the scaffold to land on the lawn. Jack was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he fell on his knees and cried, "Oh, God! Forgive me! What should I do?"

And from the thunder, a mighty Voice spoke, "Repaint! Repaint! And thin no more!"

to GuyK

Let's Give Em' Something to Talk About

Quantum Physics!

Tenth Dimension

Interesting little Flash Media show...

I'm not sure that we don't think that there's other dimensions, we just don't know how to perceive them. This talks about the 3 dimensions that most of us know, then adding onto them. Most of us don't think of time being a collection of dimensions.

Essentially, in fourth dimension 'N' there are people that could be living that are deceased in our dimension, but it doesn't mean they are deceased in that dimension. Clear as mud, right?

String theory is such an insane physics concept!

Defendant Murtha, Sounds Good

At least one of the Haditha 8 is starting to fight back. SSgt. Frank D. Wuterich has filed suit in federal court against Sen. John Murtha for defamation.

It's about damned time. I have the distinct feeling that there are going to be a lot of things coming out in this trial that a lot of the brass of the Marine Corps won't enjoy being have exposed.

Musings...

Bush's reaction to the news that Israel had resumed it's airstrikes against Hexbullah: